Regardless of their attire, language and private lives, when a spreadhead goes to a Panic show, he or she becomes one of many and reveres the warmth of anonymity and unquestioned unity. Often a spreadhead will perform worship rituals and close his or her eyes while swaying to and fro.
Spreadhead #2: "Yeah, bro, I tripped harder than I ever will again when I saw Mikey play Airplane for the last time. And you know what, man? I didn't even take any drugs..."
Panic show virgin: "I'm sorry guys, but this is my first Panic show and your contest vying for the most devoted fan is keeping me from enjoying it."
Spreadheads: "Whoa, sorry babe. Rock on, Schools!"
Me:Hold up, bro. Have you heard Mikey's jam in Dyin' Man on the "Live in the Classic City" album? Want to rip the bong?
My Roommate: Jesus, get a job.
Me: Fine. How about a mushroom cap?
guys: khaki shorts, flip flops, visor, sunglasses, giant hemp necklace- only for use at shows (wouldn't want to wear that back at the frat), earliest WSP shirt they can find- the more obscure the better- particularly if it contains an inside reference to a revered song, and a pocket or two full of drugs-preferably E; particular reverence to JB & whatever show they attended that was located furthest from their present location
girls- anything lightweight and hemp, patchwork flowy skirts, hemp jewelry, incredibly pale, no makeup, very thin (though some are chubby, they're just potheads, only occasional E users), purse full of drugs, preferably E
If these poor misguided youth would stop their continual drug use, they would understand that the music sucks @ss, and they only attend shows for the abundance of drugs.
Their only redeemable quality is the free distribution of drugs to strangers when high on E at shows...and the humor you enjoy while watching this many drugged-out yuppie kids try to dance.
A: "yea, what douchebags. they actually believe they're the new deadheads."
Q: "did you see the white guy with dreads come out of that lexus SUV?"
A: "must be a spreadhead"