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1. spanking my lunch monkey
another way to say I'm going to jack off if use wisely you
can say it loudly and no one would know what your talking
about

also used in hit my monkey with a hammer, hit my monkey, etc. come up with more by yourself
Guy 1: i was in my room spanking my lunch monkey when i was interrupted by my dad coming up the stairs

Guy 2: By the Gods, Thats so dirty. I hope you didn't get blue balls.

Guy 1: I'd rather not talk about it