Colonel Sandurz: How about you two? Found anything yet?
Black Gaurd: We ain't found shit!
Colonel Sandurz: It's Mega-Maid! She's gone from suck to blow!
Dark Helmet: I bet she gives great helmet.
Ludicrous speed, GO!
Dark Helmet: Out of order? FUCK! Even in the future, nothing works!
President Skroob: Sandurz, Sandurz. You got to help me. I don't know what to do. I can't make decisions. I'm a president!
Dark Helmet: So, Lone Star, now you see that evil will always triumph because "good is dumb."
Dark Helmet: What's the matter Colonel Sandurz? Chicken?
Dark Helmet: Who made that man a gunner?
Maj. Asshole: I did, sir. He's my cousin.
Dark Helmet: Who is he?
Col. Sandurz: He's an Asshole, sir.
Dark Helmet: I know that. What's his name?
Col. Sandurz: That is his name, sir. Asshole, Major Asshole.
Dark Helmet: And his cousin?
Col. Sandurz: He's an Asshole too, sir. Gunner's Mate, First Class, Philip Asshole.
Dark Helmet: How many Assholes we got on this ship, any how?
Dark Helmet: I knew it. I'm surrounded by Assholes. Keep firing, Assholes!
Dark Helmet: You have the ring, and I see your Schwartz is as big as mine. Now, let's see how well you handle it.
Dark Helmet: WHAT? You went over my helmet?
Dark Helm.: What the hell am I looking at? When does this happen in the movie?
Colonel Sandurz: Now. You're looking at now, sir. Everything that happens now is happening now.
Dark Helm.: What hapened to then?
Colonel Sandurz: We passed then.
Dark Helm.: When?
Colonel Sandurz: Just now. We're at now now.
Dark Helm.: Go back to then.
Colonel Sandurz: When?
Dark Helm.: Now!
Colonel Sandurz: Now?
Dark Helm.: Now!
Colonel Sandurz: I can't.
Dark Helm.: Why?
Colonel Sandurz: We missed it.
Dark Helm.: When?
Colonel Sandurz: Just now.
Dark Helm.: When will then be now?
Colonel Sandurz: Soon.
Dark Helm.: Knock on my door! Knock next time!
Colonel Sandurz: Yes, sir!
Dark Helm.: Did you see anything?
Colonel Sandurz: No, sir! I didn't see you playing with you dolls again.
Dark Helm.: Good!
Guard: What the hell are you doing?
Lone Star: The Vulcan neck pinch?
Dark Helm.: Raspberry. There's only one man who would dare give me the raspberry: Lone Star!"
We will see eachother again in Spaceballs Two: The Search for More Money.
awesome movie by mel brooks
we brake for nobody
best movie spoof ever by mel brooks
spaceballs kicks ass
Mel Brooks' best movie, and one of the funnyest movies ever made, next to Airplane!
A short-term testicular problem among male astronauts after re-entry in the atmosphere. The low level of gravity exposure in space makes the cubic hairs "float," thereforefore after returning to Earth, they tend to remain in the upright position for sometime weeks at a time.
Astronaut 1: Hey Niel, how was it in the sack last night?
Niel Armsrong: Horrible. I had--- spaceballs.
A gay movie that talks about testicles. Hence the name.
Two people named Shelly and Fred are dating. Until Fred slips up..
Fred: Hey Shelly, want to watch Spaceballs with me?
Shelly: Hell no, you gay asshole!
That's why you shouldn't watch Spaceballs.
A mediocre movie with little to no humor in it whatsoever that some feeble old man made who had nothing better to do with his so called life. A cheap parody of Star Wars. Humiliates and embarrasses people everywhere who are unfortunate enough to get stuck with the last name Schwartz and also makes fun of the amazing Star Wars series. Thanks a lot Mel Brooks.
Geek 1: "Hahaha Spaceballs is so awesome, best movie ever!"
(Smarter)Geek 2: "Uh no way dude, it totally made fun of Star Wars which are the best movies ever!"