Top Definition
A fecalphobic response to the necessity of having to wipe one's own uptarded ass whereby said swine mummifies his/her hoof with a crapper clogging amount of old growth toilet paper in a daily All-American celebration of excess and waste.
That shitphobic corporate pig, Dick Cheney, nuked my crapper, then clogged it with his uptarded shitmitt.
by mrwhiipl February 11, 2004

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Once you have used the restroom to defecate, you proceed to leave the facilities without washing your hands. (also known in Canada as "Shanz". )
Co worker 1: Hey, I just saw Mark coming out of the stall after throwing mud, and he didn't wash his hands before going to his office.

Co-worker 2: Oh no, I just shook Mark's hand.

Co-worker 1: :Damn, he just got you with his shit mitts.
by The Hankys January 08, 2013

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The grime you get on your hand when fisting someone in the pipe. Warning: Failure to wash within 4 hours could result in the "Candy-Coated Shit-Mitt"
I got a Shit-Mitt from Steve's wife.
by Kal-El March 05, 2004

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To not wash your hands after wiping your ass.
I just watched the boss leave the bathroom without washing his hands. Do not lend him your pen - he has shit mitts!
by The Psychologist February 15, 2007

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A hand thats been up someones arse.Sometimes covered with fecal matter. Hence, the name shit-mitt.
Yo i gave Daves mom a fist in the ass. She gave me a serious shit-mitt.
by Bobby Cumbucket May 13, 2006

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The process of wrapping your hand in multiple layers of toilet paper preventing fecal contamination.
I always use a shit mitt when dropping deuce in a public restroom.
by ChipScar July 22, 2010

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