scientology - 75 billion years ago, (3 times longer then the universe is belived to be by top scientists) in a federation of 11 galaxy's, warlord 'xenu' the dominant figure in the federation had a population crisis, so paraletic drugs were administored to trillions of the populus and then they were transported via dc-10 space planes, planes from the 50's and 60's, they were then dropped around the planet earths volcano's, and then atom bombs were fired inside them to instantly kill the trillions of 'thetans'. To stop the souls from escaping xenu had large force fields and ghost hovers to suck up the souls of the 'thetans' and placed them in 3-D viewing stations, basically 3-D cinema which showed 'xenu's' false gods, every other relgious belife and left them to wonder the planet eternally, but intellegent life formed and the thetans massed around the hosts and poisoned ther minds with relgion, and scientology claims to be the only way to remove this unhappyness through auditing sessions,and through a perminant subcription, and constatnt purchasing of over 3000 books on how to live in a scientological fashion. The creator as im sure you know was l.ron.hubbard, the most sly sex pest know to have exsisted, the law should forbid scientology to exsist due to it being utterly rediculous beyond belife and reason, its a money sapping con and will lead to disspear and brainwashing.
if your a follower of scientology please kill youself
by jon puzzle February 04, 2008
basically a bullshit religon which desperate celberties believe in and other desperate fucks
Omg! Tom Cruise is so stupid because of his extreme amouunt money he combusted and became a member of scientology just like michael Jacckson, when he turned rich he decided to fuck lil boys and turn white....waaa fucking hooooo yay to all of you combusted fuckers
by miamiheatonfire3 August 26, 2006
Proof that humans are so desperate to be told what to think, rather than seek and question for themselves, that they can be easily led about by someone claiming to have the answers to all of the burning questions they are too lazy to answer for themselves. Scientology is also an example of the saying, "If you believe in nothing, you'll fall for anything." Intellectually-challenged individuals buy into a philosophy that makes them feel that the cause of all of their woes does not lie with them, but the human existence that they are trapped in.

In essence, Scientologists are a more successful version of furries. Rather than deluding themselves into thinking they are animals trapped in human bodies, they believe they are aliens trapped in human bodies. Scientology is what furrydom or trekkies would be if they became a formally-recognized religion.
"I just had someone tell me that I'm a meek "Earth native" and then said something about them being a Vorlon trapped in a human body. I'm not sure if they were from the Church of Scientology or a furry convention."

"Were they dressed in fake ears and tail?"


"Then they were probably a Scientologist."
by Onikaze March 23, 2006
Founded in the 1950's by pulp fiction writer L. Ron Hubbard Scientology is "the study of truth." It comes from the Latin word "scio" meaning "knowing in the fullest sense of the word" and the Greek word "logos" meaning "study of."

Scientologists believe that the body is a enternal spiritual being, and that one can not only solve their own problems, accomplish goals and gain lasting happiness, but also achieve new, higher states of awareness and ability.

Nah seriously, Scientology is a bunch of fricken crap! Using mind control techniques anyone participating in the cult's "auditing" will be converted into a total brain dead drone. Just ask Tom Cruise and his mindless "partner" Katie Holmes

Keep away - unless you want to lose all your money, friends and brain cells.
You don't know the history of psychiatry. I do.
- you're glib. Matt matt matt matt matt... now, where's a couch?

-- Scientology brainwashed cultee
by Suri May 19, 2006
The very definition of retarded. Wackos who believe that aliens were ass rapped on earth and killed by a space dictator. Also practice this them selves.
man one "Dude I heard that bob is joining Scientology."

man two "yeah, better cover your ass or he'll get it."

man one "he'll pull a Tom Cruise on me?"

by jokemonkey2 February 09, 2007
A disease which infects many weak souls. Anyone infected with the disease feels they are superior, and the only ones who understand life. The disease also makes people act like a bunch of loudmouthed assholes who just want to sell books for their psuedo-religion. Comparable to placebos, a chimp's behind, and communism.
If scientology were a person, it would be slightly gay, and with small genitalia.
by the storm March 18, 2006
Technically this word is a mishmash of latin and greek:

Scient (from the latin scientia) meaning knowledge

and Ology (from greek) to talk about (implies studying)

Mr. Hubbard the all seeing should have known better than to mix the two languages in one word.

Other examples of well formed non-made up words of this type are:

Theology: Talking about God (both halves from Greek)
Biology: Talking about living things (both halves from Greek)
Ron: I just made up a word for my rip-off religion, it's "Scientology" from the ancient words for knowledge and study.

Scino: But aren't they from two different ancient languages, I'm not sure you can do that...

Ron: What the hell do you know??? Who's the cult leader here???

Scino: Is that a tax inspector over there?

Ron: No it's Xenu! We'd better run anyway!
by The Grinstead Courier December 14, 2005
1. A religion that dicks you out of your money and is overall very stupid.

2. A very stale internet meme. It was funny the first time when it was on South Park but when YTMND picked it up FIVE FUCKING MONTHS later and repeated the joke over and over and over and over it got completely stale. Ok. We get it. Xenu is a stupid story, blah blah blah. MOVE ON.
1. Guy 1: God Scientology is stupid.
Guy 2: I know.

Guy 2: You're a moron.
by Eric August 14, 2006

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