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A halfassed plot for a sci-fi novel turned into a 'Religion' by L. Ron Hubbard.
A Scientologist and his money are soon parted.
by Justin June 19, 2005
the one religion where doing cocaine is a must .. seeing as it was made by L. Ron Hubbard you have to be high on coke to take it seriously .. come the fuck on L. RON HUBBARD HE WROTE FICTIONAL NOVELS FOR CHRISTS SAKE!
Id rather worship an old ladys cooch then be a scientolo-fag(scientology)
by Bardiel October 01, 2005
L. Ron Hubbard's successful attempt to win a bet made in 1948, with Robert Heinlein, that the best way to get rich was to start a religion. Scientology was that religion, kicked off by the pseudo-self-help book Dianetics in 1949. By 1982, Hubbard's income from the Church of Scientology was about 40 million a year. There's some question about whether Scientologists murdered Hubbard, but Scientologists didn't allow an investigation before cremating the body. The head of Scientology today is a guy named David Miscavige, and the second-tier defacto rulers are in a sub-sect called the Sea Org. Spiritual enlightenment, thinking for yourself, and attempting to leave the organization are strongly discouraged, and punishable by confinement, beatings, and psychological torture. And, gee whiz, for a lot of money and some slave labor, you can buy your way into the entrails of Scientology too!
hmmm... That's some pretty good propaganda. You could start another scientology with it.
by Cygnet September 27, 2005
A cash-driven pseudo religion that encourages it's members to dress up as 8' dogs with dreadlocks and run around in the future
John Travolta went to the Church of Scientology to discuss his latest movie treatment
by MightyScoop1 August 13, 2003
A Satanic cult that makes you fat.
I think they're in cahoots with Jenny Craig.
by Jimmy Kimmel March 13, 2005
THIS IS WHAT SCIENTOLOGISTS ACTUALLY BELIEVE: Xenu (sometimes Xemu) is introduced as an alien ruler of the "Galactic Confederacy" who, 75 million years ago, brought billions of people to Earth in DC-8-like spacecraft, stacked them around volcanoes and blew them up with hydrogen bombs. Their souls then clustered together and stuck to the bodies of the living, and they continue to do this today, wreaking havoc in the process. Hubbard called these clustered spirits "Body Thetans," and the advanced levels place considerable emphasis on isolating them and neutralizing their ill effects. I must tell you the founder of this so-called "religion" was L.Ron Hubbard a SCIENCE-FICTION writer. Hubbard's 1958 book Have You Lived Before This Life documents past lives described by individual Scientologists during auditing sessions. These included memories of being "deceived into a love affair with a robot decked out as a beautiful red-haired girl", "being run over by a Martian bishop driving a steamroller", "being transformed into an intergalactic walrus that perished after falling out of a flying saucer", and (my personal favorite) being "a very happy being who strayed to the planet Nostra 23,064,000,000 years ago". In comparison, modern astrophysical observations have established the age of the universe at 13.7 billion (13,700,000,000) years, to within about 1% confidence. Scientology, their beliefs, and followers in a nutshell...
Scientology...well what the fuck can you say about it, its a ton of bullshit.
by el reye August 27, 2006
Not to be confused with actual science or religion, this sad excuse for a religion is laughable. Created by a science fiction writer "Scientology" is almost like one of those second person choose your own adventure books.

The word science does not actually appear in the name. Instead we have "Scient," a make believe term that pulp fiction author L. Ron Hubbard made himself. He made up this word when he made up his biggest science fiction story of all time, "Scientology."
John: Hey Bill wanna join up at the church of Scientology with me?

Bill: Are you out of your fucking mind!
by alternatealien October 08, 2007
basically a bullshit religon which desperate celberties believe in and other desperate fucks
Omg! Tom Cruise is so stupid because of his extreme amouunt money he combusted and became a member of scientology just like michael Jacckson, when he turned rich he decided to fuck lil boys and turn white....waaa fucking hooooo yay to all of you combusted fuckers
by miamiheatonfire3 August 26, 2006