Welcome, I am the Government. We have a plan for your future, kid. Society will lap you like a wolf laps blood.

1. Curriculum: it is by the enforcement of curriculum that we can positively ensure your mental intake of information is kept in a rigid line. You will have no time to experience other things; even if you did you would feel guilty. “What a waist of space in my mind” You’d think.

2. Exams: It is by the continuous use of exams that we can ensure your self-esteem remains at an all-time low. Lower grades means lower respect. You will be called an idiot; you will have low chances in life. The alternative is to succumb to the weight of society, allow us to control your mind. It is easier this way. We promise.

3. Ritualistic mornings: This is the fun part! You now will have to awaken at early hours. Yes any chance of true restfulness is completely imposable. Do you ever walk into school and feel, for a split second, as though you are unconscious? That is how we want you to feel all the time. That is the point in early mornings.

4. Social humiliation: Yes, we didn’t plan this out. So don’t think we’ll take credit for it, yes this part is all thanks to you. It not only away chips away your self-esteem it also encourages hatred, which you will feel toward foreign nations later in life. We guarantee it.

5. Repetitiveness: It is by the continuous repetitiveness of your scholarly years that we can encourage a clockwork feeling within you.

6. Useless information: By presenting you with this information we can disallow independent thought. While you may begin to think for yourself your teacher, asking you to pay attention, will continually interrupt you. This is one of my favourites!

7. Obedience: Yes this is firmly set into the school world. Discipline, self-discipline, thought-discipline hell it’s all here! We take great pride in our ability to control you. Our shrill voices echoing down the corridor. Yes you needn’t ever feel safe, in or out of school. Be afraid, be very afraid.

8. Long term: This will last sometime; you probably won’t be able to remember a time you weren’t in school. No mode of comparison, excellent.

9. Holidays: We have carefully timed these so that they are long enough to maintain sanity but short enough to deter independent thought.

10. Work ethic: You cannot be a worker without work ethic.

We hope you enjoy your stay. Don’t try to escape, even if the gate is always open.
You are free to do as we tell you.
by billy bo bo June 04, 2005
a fucking place where people have to waste god knows how much of their life as kids and young adults going to where they learn shit , of which like over 90 % is gonna be ABSOLUTELY FUCKING USELESS TO THEM AS ADULTS and like 50 % of which theyre gonna forget!

honestly, how many people are gonna fucking need to know about any shit they learn in history class,how to calculate the fucking area of a triangle when u know an angle beside it or whatever the fuck, shit in english like poetry terms like omonawhatever , and other crap?
how many people are gonna remember all any of it?

also, we get fucking teachers who have anger management problems and give u a fucking detention for like breathing, which wastes even more of ur life

im not sayin there should be no school,or people shouldnt be educated, but school should be seriously modified so people learn what they should learn and choose what they want to learn for the future

and for of those of u retards who think the only people who bash school are the ones who get shitty grades, i actually have good grades, so go fuck urselves!
" we dont need no education ?ô
we dont need no thought control
no dark sarcasm in the classroom
TEACHERS, LEAVE THEM KIDS ALONE!!?ô"
by bman321 May 29, 2005
hell
by Frost November 01, 2003
12 years or more of shit streamed bollox that is taught to you just because your brain can just about handle it. Teachers don't understand that children are human beings and instead like to enforce ridiculus rules just because they are in a room that is by a stupid law.. theirs. 6 hours of the day you are sent to this virtual prison. When you finally escape and have the freedom to do as you please you realise that those homework leg chains clamp you to your desk and unless you write about something you have already learned you will not get unlocked. Even if you abuse these chains you become then taken back to the prison for extra time for not writing out 5 times what you already know. Why do we have to do it? "To realise the opportunities in life and get a good job a live a normal life with an average job" you forgot with taxes and loans and crap still forcing us into social breakdown just because you decided to spend that little extra on yourself. Is it a shame to enjoy yourself? No it isn't. School seems to make people think it is
Teacher: I said stop talking!!

Student: (quiet muttering)

Teacher: I HEARD THAT! AN HOURS DETENTION!

Teacher: Why didn't you do your homework?

Honest student: I had other homework to do and also i needed some time to chill out. You only gave us a day to do it.

Teacher: I GAVE YOU MORE THAN ENOUGH TIME! YOU WILL FINISH IT AND MORE AFTER SCHOOL!!
by Matthew Legg May 23, 2006
Hell with florescent lighting.
Math Problem:

School = Hell
by Funni Bunni April 26, 2005
Something that should never had existed!
What? School is LEGAL?????
by Snajper June 15, 2004
The place where children from 4-18 are forced to go to. It is probably the cause of 30% of suicidals from children. The teachers are one of the following. Good- usually in 20's... these teachers know what bad teachers are and make learning about things fun and enjoyable also, maybe doesnt hand out alot of homework. Normal- These teachers are alright. They make it semi exicting, and somtimes do fun stuff, and somtimes do boring stuff. Maybe hands out an ok ammount of homework. Bad- These people are idiots. They keep you inside a room with boring crap on the walls and assign you to sit next to people you hate on purpose. They hand out large ammounts of homework after a large assignment is givin in class. They sit you in there for what seems like the whole day forcing you to read books with pages torn out and written on. They dont care that your a person, they yell at you for the tinist things. See asshole douchebag asshole. But, even if you have the good kind of teacher, school is still murder. They keep you in there for 6-7 hours. You only learn like one thing per 3 days because all you do is review. Also, schools are full of gangsters, assholes, gays, gay bashers, racists, tatle tales, thives, annoing people, gamefreaks, hyper people, people who think theyre funny but they arent corny. Also, there is peer pressure. You fall under one of the 3 categories. "Cool", "Normals", or "Losers". You are typicly made fun of if you fall under normals or losers. Cool people don't let you even talk to them, and if you do you will get your ass kicked in an ally after school. But, its all worth it. Though most of the things you learn (example: knowing how to make a guitar out of rubber bands and a box) you wont need to know. But alot of the things such as math, spelling, and geography you will need to know. So school can be alright if you ignore the jerkoffs.
Jeff at 13: My gayass teacher gave us a math assignment. ILL NEVER NEED TO USE THIS CRAP!

Jeff at 33 works as a math teacher and has recived 10 best teacher awards. He makes a heafty ammount of money yearly and has a nice house and 2 kids.
by Miniman447 May 04, 2005
An educational institution whose good intentions would be realized if not for its inherent inefficiency and lack of useful knowledge.
Are they shallow enough to believe that Jane Schaffer, world history, and conceptual physics will really affect my life?
by XeL March 09, 2005

Free Daily Email

Type your email address below to get our free Urban Word of the Day every morning!

Emails are sent from daily@urbandictionary.com. We'll never spam you.

×