look up any word, like blumpkin:
 
4.
Welcome, I am the Government. We have a plan for your future, kid. Society will lap you like a wolf laps blood.

1. Curriculum: it is by the enforcement of curriculum that we can positively ensure your mental intake of information is kept in a rigid line. You will have no time to experience other things; even if you did you would feel guilty. “What a waist of space in my mind” You’d think.

2. Exams: It is by the continuous use of exams that we can ensure your self-esteem remains at an all-time low. Lower grades means lower respect. You will be called an idiot; you will have low chances in life. The alternative is to succumb to the weight of society, allow us to control your mind. It is easier this way. We promise.

3. Ritualistic mornings: This is the fun part! You now will have to awaken at early hours. Yes any chance of true restfulness is completely imposable. Do you ever walk into school and feel, for a split second, as though you are unconscious? That is how we want you to feel all the time. That is the point in early mornings.

4. Social humiliation: Yes, we didn’t plan this out. So don’t think we’ll take credit for it, yes this part is all thanks to you. It not only away chips away your self-esteem it also encourages hatred, which you will feel toward foreign nations later in life. We guarantee it.

5. Repetitiveness: It is by the continuous repetitiveness of your scholarly years that we can encourage a clockwork feeling within you.

6. Useless information: By presenting you with this information we can disallow independent thought. While you may begin to think for yourself your teacher, asking you to pay attention, will continually interrupt you. This is one of my favourites!

7. Obedience: Yes this is firmly set into the school world. Discipline, self-discipline, thought-discipline hell it’s all here! We take great pride in our ability to control you. Our shrill voices echoing down the corridor. Yes you needn’t ever feel safe, in or out of school. Be afraid, be very afraid.

8. Long term: This will last sometime; you probably won’t be able to remember a time you weren’t in school. No mode of comparison, excellent.

9. Holidays: We have carefully timed these so that they are long enough to maintain sanity but short enough to deter independent thought.

10. Work ethic: You cannot be a worker without work ethic.

We hope you enjoy your stay. Don’t try to escape, even if the gate is always open.
You are free to do as we tell you.
by billy bo bo June 04, 2005
 
9.
A place where you are tortured and brainwashed
No please don't take me to school anywhere but there!
by Clint Rue November 13, 2003
 
10.
A place, supposedly for students to learn, that might be fun if the teachers used more creative methods, introduced a better atmosphere into the classroom and had respect for students and their ideas. Many teachers do this but many others, unfortunately, do not, making school merely a social forum/ social hellhole. Oddly enough, gifted education teachers seem to have classes that are easier to pass because it's more enjoyable and creative.
Teacher One: You get to choose which way to do this project.

Teacher Two: You're doing this project THIS way with THIS information because I said so!
by Misha February 25, 2005
 
11.
The single worst place in the universe.
Where human rights are banished upon stepping into a room. You cannot sip water, eat, go to the toilet or have a fair trial. The place where we are beaten up, bullied, stolen from, forced to write until you have aches in our arms, where you cannot speak without fear of horrible punishment. Where if seven hours of solid work is not enough to impress a teacher, you are given two hours of homework.
AND, if the homework is incomplete, you are forced into detention for three hours, tearing up paper.
School is the only place that can get away with such universal cruelty. Oh, and apparently, education is too good to miss. BULLSHIT.
Typical school scene

Student: May I go to the toilet
Teacher: No
Student: Please.
Teacher: I've already told you you incolent fool
(5 mins later)
Student: Ive wet myself
Teacher: Well why dident you go to the toilet
Student: You said I couldent
Teacher: How DARE you question me!
two hours detention!
Student: but...
Teacher: Three hours
by Easy come easy go hey spaziela? December 12, 2005
 
12.
to humiliate, to destroy
The F.G. schooled the Kill Squad.
by Rolls August 18, 2004
 
13.
Two words: Hell hole.

I mean, come on! When in the hell will people just learn that no matter what they say kids don't give a shit?

School is a place to go if you want to find pot-heads, sluts, incredibly boring lectures that noone listens to anyway, the retarded, slow-witted beast known as the "principle", and any other form of shit that makes one's chlildhood less enjoyable.

Hell, my dad was thrown against a wall by a teacher, and got a concussion.
What the f*** is wrong with people that send their kids to scholl?
by Lieutenant Tarpit July 10, 2004
 
14.
An institution originally noncompulsory, now a forced hellhole where otherwise reasonably intelligent people are forced to go for 14 years.

It instills in them a great hatred of what they otherwise would not despise; for example, many children who hate history don't actually hate the Civil War. They just hate that they're being forced to memorize names and dates. If they were left to their own devices, they would probably end up knowing the basics about the Civil War without having to spend pointless hours proving to some mindless beaurocrat that they know what they're talking about.

An institution that takes too long to not do enough. An institution that makes people believe that it is the only way anyone will ever learn anything or meet anyone. Apparently the real world and libraries and the Internet are not valid places of learning or places to socialize. Nope, you have to go with all the other inmates in an environment where you get no respect at all from dipshits with a special piece of paper that says they know how to humiliate you.

Pavlov's dogs, but teenagers.

A place where they're so freaking retarded they can't just make school noncompulsory. If it were noncompulsory, after a while everyone would get bored with playing video games and wander in to school to go to the chemistry lab where a chemist would show them how to do what they wanted to do.

A place where people assume you're incapable of just picking up Dickens on your own, so they have to force you to read Oliver Twist NOW so you'll hate classic literature all your life.

A place where well-meaning people destroy creativity.

School is not learning. People hate school, not a^2+b^2=c^2. They hate having to wake up early after doing homework late, having to go to a place where they have no free will and come home to where it's just reinforced by their parents.

School creates a huge inferiority complex and denies us our status as humans so corporations come in and promise us the chance to feel something intense if we just buy their snake oil. A chance to be respected if we buy their shoes, wear their wristbands, bring our mp3 players around in our $300 backpacks specially designed for the $800 bike we ride around so we can complain when we go through a puddle and splash our overpriced jeans made by abused children in India.

School is hell.
Student: Mr. Smith, when was the last time you needed to know the population density of Finland?

Teacher: IF YOU DON'T LEARN THIS POINTLESS SHIT EVEN MOST FINNS PROBABLY DON'T KNOW, YOU'LL NEVER GO ON TO A REALLY EXPENSIVE SCHOOL TO IMPRESS ANOTHER PROFESSOR, AND THEN GET A PIECE OF PAPER TO IMPRESS ANOTHER BEAUROCRAT!

Student:... Fuck this, I'm going to go carve wood.

Teacher: GET BACK HERE! DETENTION!

10 years later: ...He attributes his massive success to skipping school so he could practice woodcarving, which when coupled with his love of music led him to carve flutes. Now 26, Mr. Student is doing what he loves and living within his means. What a shame the rest of us are brainwashed fucks. This is Anchorman, XYA News.

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I am always ready to learn, I am never ready to go to school.

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Eric, damn it, you failed your chemistry test! You'll die of lung cancer now!

... But Dad, I want to be a poet...

SHUT UP, ERIC! You're going to fail at life and never get married or have kids or do anything because YOU FAILED HIGH SCHOOL CHEMISTRY!

Dad, do you remember any of your high school chemistry?

Yeah, I remember all of it and it's what's helped me get this bullshit cubicle job. Now go get on your bike and go to school.
by Eric Greenfeld May 26, 2006