1. A fake Christmas from the north pole who make toys for good boys and girls with his elves and wife.
2. A Turkish man named St. Nicholas who made little trinkets for poverty-stricken children and put the toys in the shoes they left on their doorsteps.
3. A lie parents tell their children so they don't cause trouble all year but'll never go to the 'jects.
4. The guy at the mall and the kids take a picture with some desperate fat guy who probably is a drunk who abuses his wife and hates kids.
1. "Ho! Ho! Ho!"
3. Timmy, if you're good and quiet Santa Claus will get you that bike you want...and I can fuck Uncle Nick all year without you telling this time.
4. Ho!Ho!Ho...later...Fuckin' brats (chugs) this soup is cold bitch! (slaps wife).
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The fat bastard who didn't give me a Bumblebee Transformer in 1985, and will die a slow, painful death for being such a lying son of a bitch.
Me: All I want this year is a Bumblebee Transformer.
Santa Claus: Alright, you've got it.
--- Christmas morning 1985 ---
Me: (sobbing) Mommy, I didn't get a Bumblebee Transformer.
Mommy: Santa must not have had enough in stock for all the demand.
Me: (yelling) I don't give a shit, he's a fucking lying fat bastard!
--- Christmas Eve 2010 ---
Santa Claus: What the...? Who are you?
Me: I'm the kid you didn't get off your fat ass to find a Bumblebee Transformer for in 1985.
Santa Claus: I'm sorry.
Me: You will be sorry when I feed you your own nuts! Where's my scissors? And by the way, the Bumblebee Transformer isn't too hard to find now. I've got one right here. Bend over and I'll show it to you.
by This Bumblebee Transformer is going up your fucking ass Jul 30, 2006 add a video
The code name for a pedifile that has cannot be caught because he knows when your awake. Think about it...first he watches children to see if the are being "naughty" or "nice" then on christmas eve he breaks into home in the middle of the night, leaves "presents" for little "boys and girls", eat ALL the cookies and drinks up all the white stuff then leaves with a sadistic "ho ho ho".
kid1* did santa claus come to your house last night?
kid2* i...i don't wanna talk about it *bursts into tears*
A drunk fat guy in a red suit who broke my heart at a mall when I was little.
Santa Claus: Tony, have you been nice this year?
Me: Yea, Santa!
Santa Claus: NO YOU HAVEN'T YOU LYING SON OF A BITCH, I SAW YOU TAKE A CRAP IN THAT LADY'S PURSE!
He's making a list and checking it twice. Apparently, he'll find out who's naughty or nice.
Santa Claus is coming to town.
The term "Santa Claus" is an American distortion of the Dutch name "San Niccolaus", meaning "Saint Nicolas". He is known by many other names around the world, such as "Kris Kringle" in some places and "Father Christmas" in Great Britain. Saint Nick was a Catholic bishop in what is now modern Turkey during the days of the Roman Empire. He left gifts for poor people in his town and after he died the legend of St. Nick coming to homes in a chariot carrying presents for good people was born. The legend was spread along with Christianity and when that faith reached the Arctic St. Nick started riding a sleigh pulled by flying reindeer. The legend spread around the globe and in the 20th century in America Coca-Cola provided the modern image of "Santa" as fat, jolly, rotund, with white hair and beard, wearing a red suit and black boots and of course, drinking a bottle of Coke. He is beloved by children all over.
Santa Claus is based on a real person, just like many "fairy tales" and myths that have existed throughout history.
A large man in a red suit who hates Jews and all other non-Christians. Santa Clause is a rampant consumerist and breaks into houses for milk and cookies.
That fat-fucker Santa Clause didn't leave me any presents because he is intolerant.
Every boys idol because he's knows where all the naughty girls live.
Jonny: Santa, I just want something that will makes me really happy on Christmas Day.
Santa Claus: Well Jonny, I know what Jenny does when everyone else is asleep.