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4.
A group of scammers/fraudsters whose duty it is to steal from the normal working-class public, and fail to reach their delivery times/dates. They are sometimes dubbed the 'Royal FAIL/Royal Snail' due to their lack of care and accuracy in the matter. They appear to be getting worse by the day, it's highly recommended that you don't put your trust and faith into them, as they'll grind you to the ground.
Sue: Hey! Did you get my birthdy card?
Bob: No, what birthday card!?
Sue: Well I sent it out with the Royal Mail 5 days ago...
Bob: No, sorry.
by CroydonBoy December 12, 2007
 
1.
A bunch of arrogant cunts who nick your items just when there about to get delivered, and still have the fuckin cheek to post a letter through the door saying your item is at the main post office.
You mother fuckers, why dont you just cut my throat open and shit down my neck, your the worst delivery service ever! cunts, twats, motherfuckers
by Begum March 16, 2005
 
2.
Bunch of mugs that lose your mail, open it, destroy it, can't deliver it on time n send it to the wrong address. Then decide it would be good for the people of the UK that they all go on strike. WORST DELIVERY SERVICE IN THE WORLD!
I bought a game off the internet last month on "Guaranteed Next Day Delivery", still hasn't came, nice one cheers Royal Mail!
by Doze24 October 12, 2007
 
3.
Pre-Privatisation:
A public organisation whose purpose it is to collect mail and parcels and deliver them to the required addresses in the United Kingdom and Overseas. And they do their job well.

Post-Privatisation:
A Private group of scammers whose purpose it is to charge you through the nose for a service they have no intention of providing, then spend the rest of the day employing illegal immagrants to sort through all the mail to see what is worth keeping or selling.
If you ever need to get rid of a body, pack it up and send it to yourself special delivery, and you can be guaranteed you will never see it again.
by Fucked_off_Gopher May 13, 2005
 
5.
A bunch of fucking arseholes who make you pay them so they can delivery expensive items and then lose them, and then have the cheek to offer you a shitty fucking £34 pounds in compensation when it cost half that to send it.
I sold a laptop on ebay and Royal Mail lost it.
by ExtremelyPissedOff June 06, 2009
 
6.
When an unwitting participant rolls down their window to converse while an accomplice waits in the wings.

While the window is down, said accomplish springs into action and leaps through the air passing the window. At the apex he/she lands a direct hit of flatulence delivered in the open window.

They have just delivered the "Royal Mail."
I was trying to get directions when that asshole delivered the Royal Mail.
by Pseudocrotch November 01, 2009