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1.
When a member of the reptile species gets a boner in the water and tries to play it cool by laying in a plank-like fashion.

(Note: never insult a Southern Floridian Alligator with drift wood... you'll poke your eye out.)
Jason: I went down to the beach and saw the Geico Gecko doing the backstroke and he looked more like a shark!
Hal: Mad driftwood?
Jason: Reptile driftwood fo' sho'!
by thebee'sknees March 08, 2012