cranial rectitis 

1. n. A condition noted by behaving in such a puerile, obnoxious, and moronic manner as to have one's head up his or her ass. Note that things are dark and smelly for someone with this condition.
2. When someone is severely afflicted to the point that his or her shoulders are two-blocked against the buttocks, this is known as "perpendicular cranial rectitis."

Why do all those Hollywood idiots have such cranial rectitis?
Boy, Harry Reid debates with all the intellectual acumen of SpongeBob SquarePants. How did he contract perpendicular cranial rectitis?

cranial rectitis by Dan1271 November 8, 2007

Rektified 

The state of feeling so rekt that you don't even know what to do.

Bob just got rektified by Amy
His fault for pissing her off.

He sat there frozen for like twenty minutes.

Rektified by Leapyearbabeh March 17, 2016

Ocular rectitis 

When the nerves between your anus and eyes switch and you have a shitty outlook on life.

*after listening to someone bitch/be negative/ have a shitty outlook on life* "Wow, looks like you're suffering from ocular rectitis."

Ocular rectitis by From my awesome grandfather <3 September 1, 2010

occulo rectitis 

Occulo rectitis occurs when you have your head so far up your ass,you have a shitty outlook on life.

I used to work with that bastard, he has severe occulo rectitis.

occulo rectitis by JB McDuffie June 6, 2007

retifism

Shoe fetishism; one who is sexually aroused by shoes or footwear.

I'm really into retifism--there's nothing hotter than a woman wearing high heeled shoes. Love those stilettos!

retifism by elementalangst May 25, 2006

ocular rectitis 

this is the medical term for not being able to see your ass doing a particular daily activity. eg. school, work.

Phone conversation with boss
Boss: Hello
Me: Hi, this is(your name here)I can't make it into work today. I have ocular rectitis.
Boss: That sounds serious
Me: Ya, I can't see my ass coming to work today....

ocular rectitis by Kaelli May 10, 2010

Rectifier 

The inverse of the very popular and entertaining Shocker. e.g. 2 in the stink, 1 in the pink; two in the ass one in the grass; two in the butt one in the slut; two in the boot, one in the koot; goin to town with two in the brown, etc.

She had rolled over as I was going for the Shocker, so she got the Rectifier instead.

Rectifier by Joe Rectifier June 18, 2003