Most pre-meds are mostly Asian or Indian, have no friends, and alternate between hours of studying and hours of drinking. The last one wouldn't be bad except once a pre-med gets drunk, it turns into either a crying girl or a loud bro, ruining the party for everyone else.
Also, they are complete morons and only get by through memorization and kissing ass. Because of their incompetence, they are a great source of amusement for chemistry majors, especially in organic chemistry.
At some point during his/her junior or senior year, the pre-med takes the MCAT, which brutally rapes the pre-med. What the average pre-med doesn't realize is that the exam wouldn't be so bad if the pre-med spent the last three or four years studying instead of thinking up ways in which to backstab peers.
Upon failing to get into medical school, most pre-meds end up becoming lab techs (aka. the biology major's and chemistry major's bitches).
**The previous does not apply to premeds who are in ROTC. You men and women deserve a damn loud applause for your service.
Student 2: "I'm pre-med."
Student 1: "That's nice, but it's not a major."
Student 2: "Oh, I guess I'm a biology major."
Student 1: "Why did you pick that field?"
Student 2: "Because I want to help people."
Student 1: "Really? Why don't you sign up for Doctors Without Borders or become a doctor in the Army?"
Student 2: "ummm...."
Student A: "Dude, that organic exam was so hard..."
Student B: "Wtf you talking about? All that was on there was nomenclature. What are you? A fucking dumbass?"
Student A: "Yeah, I AM a pre-med..."
People who are pre-meds want to be doctors for many reasons, including the good reasons (which does not mean they have to join the army to save people because it will mean other sacrifices such as sacrificing being with their family) and not so good reasons. These not so good reasons include the misguided idea that they can make a lot of money, which is actually not true if they look at the amount of, for example, insurance they have to pay.
Premed 2: What, why? How?
Premed 1: I'm trying to score a C so I can show my parents and maybe they'll finally let me be a math major.
Premed 1: I now understand why doctors are so douche.
Premed 2: You mean "douche" like someone walking around with a "number 1 premed" shirt?
Premed 1: -Looks down at shirt- Oh yeah...
Person: I hate pre-meds; they're such asses. Look at that one walking around with a "number 1 premed" shirt?
Premed: You mean like the guy walking around with a "biology major and proud" shirt?
Person: -Looks down at shirt- Oh yeah...
Person1: I hate people who use words like douche and tool. It's just so...
Person1: Yeah, seriously. Why can't they just talk regular words? It's not like we don't already have words that mean the same thing.
Pre-med: Don't hate because you know you can't do this work.
Other student: The world would be better without you pre-meds.
Pre-med: Keep saying that until you're in the hospital about to die and see what your doctor says.