| 1. | Fathers Advice | ||
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A fathers advice (Frank Nash, father of Holly and Anna Nash) of how to save yourself when being raped, is to tell the rapist that you are on your period. Rapist: IMA FUCK YOUR BRAINS OUT BIATCH
Victim: NOO PLEASE NOO, IM ON MY PERIOD! Rapist: OHH HELL NO! Victim: Same time next week? Rapist: Yeah cool Fathers advice is good. |
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| 2. | crab advice | ||
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Read the first entry for crab bucket and you will find what is meant here. more...
This is usually somebody that is close to you that gives it; they exploit your trust. It is when somebody tries giving you advice that, either directly or indirectly, is meant to influence you to make a decision that ultimately affects you negatively. This is done by telling you that your job that affords you a better lifestyle than they have/had at that age is a bad idea, trying to convince you that you are stupid when in reality your intelligence and potential are much higher than theirs, telling you that the potential mate you can obtain that is better than they can get is a long list of negative things, etc. Unfortunately, this tends to work, because most people would never suspect that somebody close to them would give them such selfish and malevolent advice. Hell, most people don't even know what "crab mentality" really is. Another unfortunate thing, is that even if you know beyond any reasonable doubt what the ulterior motive is, especially if people victimize themselves when confronted with something like this, good luck trying to convince anybody of it. Please use even a bit of critical thinking when it comes to the things that people say to influence you, even if it seems like it is in your best interest; ESPECIALLY if they try persistently. :) |
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| 3. | Please Advise | ||
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The proverbial business bitchslap. Hi Carrie,
How are you? Happy Monday! I was wondering when you were going to get me that quote I asked for last week. If we don't get the ball rolling ASAP my client will look for another company. Please advise. All the best, Christine. |
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| 4. | Please be advised | ||
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A meaningless phrase that prefaces relevant information. It is basically unnecessary if not redundant, as one is engaged in the very act of “advising” when issuing a warning, imparting knowledge, or giving advice. “Please be advised” is used excessively by people in law enforcement and sometimes by those who became serious about life at a very late age, and now maintain blogs that purport to warn the public about what is largely one-sided, uninteresting crap. Ryan: Officer Murphy, please be advised that our suspect is driving a Jeep.
Murphy: Ryan, the fact that you’re advising me is understood in the information you have just given to me. Saying “please be advised” is an unnecessary redundancy that pollutes our radio communication. Ryan: Ten-four. |
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| 5. | Whipped | ||
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When you're dating someone and you will do whatever it takes to say their name in any and every conversation you have with someone. No matter what it is, you will talk about them constantly. Whenever you're girlfriend/boyfriend tells you to do something, you will do it in a heartbeat because you know it will please them. Friend: "Me & my girlfriend got into ANOTHER fight. I don't know what else to do anymore man. Got any advice?"
Whipped kid: "Aw dude, that sucks. Me and my girlfriend never fight. She always comes over to my house and we watch movies and sometimes I even cook for her. She's amazing. I love how we never argue. Maybe sometimes but not alw-" Friend: "Dude! I asked you for advice! I don't give a fuck what you and your girlfriend does." Whipped Kid: "Well I'm just trying to help. I mean, our relationship is so different from everyone else's. She's so sweet and nice and she always listens to what I have to s-" Friend: "DUDE! You're fuckin' whipped man!" |
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| 6. | Vagice | ||
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Advice from a woman. Usually about things women are knowledgeable about. Grace, I don't know which facewash to buy. Can you give me some vagice, please?
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| 7. | Please Advise | ||
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An extremely stuffy phrase used by business executives to close emails when they don't understand how to ask a real question. It basically means "Please use your imagination to figure out what the fuck I need to know to make a decision on this item without making me look like an idiot in front of all the people I CCed" "Please Advise" is typically used in place of "Thanks" in formatting an email. It is very passive aggressive. Always assume that the user of the phrase "please advise" is a college graduate that follows the advice of his professors to a T... Even 15 years later.. Dear Luke,
I recently got a call from Alex in LA telling me that we're out of blinkity blank in California so the blippity blue isn't working. What-the-fuck what-the-fuck we're losing 15k a day what-the-fuck save me please. Please Advise, John |
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