The following rules apply to pirate road trips:
1. All involved dress like pirates.
2. No pirate may change their clothes or shower for the whole trip.
3. Aargh! is to be said as a part of every sentence.
4. The following word substitutions must be made at all times:
a) Car = Ship or Vessel
b) Driver = Captain
c) Left = Port
d) Right = Starboard
e) Girl/Woman = Wench
f) Steal = Pillage
5. On a rotating basis, one pirate in the ship is the Cabin Boy. The Cabin Boy must do whatever anyone else tells him to do.
6. The main beverage must be rum - wenches may drnk Bacardi Breezers.
7. Whenever there are empty bottles, it is time for Cannon Practice: try to hit roadsigns as you pass them.
8. If a pirate farts, he must call Windows Up. The ship windows must be rolled up, the air conditioner must be changed to recycled air, and nobody may wave the fart smell away from themselves.
Non-Pirate: Ten slabs of beer.
Pirate: Argh! What be this beer of which you speak? Ten bottles of your cheapest rum, check-out wench. Argh.