Top definition
a boner or erection lasting for many hours
Lauren throught it was strange that Stephen's petrified wood wasn't going away.
by k blau July 23, 2006
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2
When a old man takes too much viagra and his boner gets stuck forever, causing an awkward funeral.
Hugh Hefner had taken too many boner pills and had to have surgery because of Petrified Wood.
by garuru0 December 27, 2009
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3
When you have not had sex in a while and you get an erection that seems to never want to go away. Walking around with a constant erection. Prominent mostly in teenage boys going through puberty, and married men.
It's been so long since I got some I'm surprised my penis is not petrified. Like the wood, not scared.

Man it's been so long since I got laid that I have petrified wood.
by Flyinseamnky February 02, 2012
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The vengeful act of crapping on a lover's chest while they sleep.

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4
a.k.a. erectile dysfunction. When a chub is too frightened (petrified) to cum out.
Vajona Jackson was ready for a hot night of boner-rockin' but her man's unit was too scared to go into the dark. Therefore, his petrified wood "layed" low, unable to rise and shine.
by Vajona Jackson-Hewitt August 18, 2011
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