Identification you are forced to use to enter bars and concerts because you have previously lost your driver's license, work ID and old fake ID from college during drunken nights out.
"I have to find my passport so I can go out tonight."
"Dude, you need to stop getting so bombed and losing your ID's."
Document allowing the owner to travel abroad. Yes Americans, you can travel abroad and see the world without invading. There's some nic places out there. There are even nice people out there, even in France! Go on, give it a go.
Apologies to those Americans who own a passport. If you are one of these, and you have actually used your passport well WOOHOO!!! You are in a tiny minority of about 3% of Americans. Pat yourself on the back. I'm genuinely proud of you.
Like a little book with your picture in it. It will have your name and say that you are from America. I really think you might like it!