A Quick Listing of Rules to Learn About Ohio Before Y'all Visit Here:

1. Do not mispronounce our state name. It's "Ahia" or "Ohiuh" or "Ahio" or "Uh-hi-uh" or some variation of the forementioned (or sometimes, in the southeast, just plain "'hia"). It is NOT "Oh-high-oh". Just... no. This is the easiest way to tell if someone's from out of state.

2. Ohio is not all flat. If you think this is true then you've obviously avoided the entire eastern part of the state which is quite hilly, especially the southeastern part, being the edge of Appalachia.

3. We are better than Michigan in everything we do. Period. We have been brought up knowing and understanding this law (every Ohioan knows the song "We Don't Give a Damn For the Whole State of Michigan!" by age five); if you have the stupidity to yell, "I LOVE MICHIGAN!" in public then you will be mauled (except for maybe in Toledo, which might as well be in Michigan).

4. There are three different distinctive Ohio accents. These are:
a. The Southeast accent: From Wilmington to Cambridge and below (basically south of I70 and east of I71)(especially prevalent along the West Virginia border). Commonly mistaken for a Southern accent. I once had a teacher from Chillicothe who would tell us to "'Collar' your pictures with crayons!"
b. The Middle accent: From Cincinnati to Bellefontaine, then east to Coshocton. The median between a southern and a northern accent, commonly referred to as the typical, ideal American English accent.
c. The Northern accent: From Lima to Dover and on up. Features the stereotypical midwestern twang (most northerners don't realize they have an accent, but they do).

5. We like our corn. Corn goes with everything. And we all know the saying, "Knee high by the fourth of July!"

6. We're the only ones allowed to insult our weather. Sure, we hate it, because it changes constantly. The only thing predictable about it is that it's sure to be UNpredictable! Winter weather in May and spring weather in January? Normal. However, if you come here and complain about this, we'll agree with you... then kick your ass. We're rather proud of our sucky weather. Come back with snow boots and a pair of shorts next time and suck it up like a man.

7. It's normal to sometimes receive change (primarily pennies) in the form of Canadian currency. Don't worry about it, you're still in America.

8. We think it's hilarious when you struggle to pronounce names like Tuscarawas, Wapakoneta, Cuyahoga, etc.

9. Yeah, we have a town called Hicksville. Get over it. Delaware is a city and a county, and Lima (pronounced LIE-ma) and Miami are in Ohio.

10. WE'RE STILL BETTER THAN MICHIGAN!!
1. I'm from Ahia!
2. Ever been to Jackson County?
3. It's all Michigan's fault. See the Michigan-Ohio War.
4. Clevelanders sure do have a hard time understanding what people from Gallia County are saying.
5. It's everywhere.
6. Yesterday it was 65 degrees and sunny. Today it's 30 degrees and slushing.
7. You're not in Canada yet.
8. "What is Coo-yuh-hoe-guh??"
9. And it's up north, bordering Indiana.
10. Go Bucks.
by Ohioan December 13, 2006
Midwestern state, that borders, Indiana, Kentucky, Pennsylvania, and Michigan, and Lake Erie to the North
I was on my way to Ohio for the holidays and for some homemade cherry pie.
by Saints October 06, 2003
The only state in the country with it's own, distinctive smell.
on a road trip:

child: Daddy, what's that smell?
father: Oh, we're just passing through Sandusky.
by random michigander April 10, 2005
Home of the criminal A-holes who run the First Energy Corporation, the folks who brought you the biggest electrical blackout in recorded history, and, save for less than a sixteenth of an inch of corroded metal at a nuclear power plant, the next Three Mile Island.
"Let's just Ohio this safety inspection and save 30% in the fourth quarter."
by Abraham Lincoln August 17, 2003
Ohio is boring.
Ohio, there's sometimes clouds in the sky!
by Ohio is boring December 25, 2008
All the people on the Oregon Trail who didn't quite make it to Oregon.
"Shit, we didn't make it to Oregon. I guess we're stuck in this hellhole. Let's call it Ohio."
by Rachel Cloone October 15, 2007
A state that everyone else mispronounces, full of annoyingly random weather. One day it will be 70 degrees and sunny, and the next, it'll be 55 degrees and there'll be a tornado, then it will be 85 degrees and humid, then it will be 25 degrees with a foot of snow on the ground. No joke. This crap really happens. From the southern hicktowns to the ghettos, there's a variety to see here. Just bring all your winter coats and your bathing suits; you never know what the weather might be.
Weather: *sunny*
Random Outsider: I like Oh-high-oh!
Ohioan: Oh-high-oh? What the crap is that?
Weather: BOOM FLASH FLOOD BOOM!
Random Outsider: Wtf? I hate rain!
Ohioan: Don't worry, wait 5 minutes and it'll change.
Random Outsider: *whew*
by Random Ohioan March 26, 2005

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