Bill: dude... i totally stuck it up her ass last night! and she liked it!! i thought she would hate me...
Ted: whoa... what a total noff crime.
:::Protagonist dictating joyously to the on-site Reporter:::
Protagonist: "I am entirely grateful to the city workers who broke that water mane that completely destroyed my backyard by flooding it! I would have never found out that Jimmy Hoffa was buried there! I'm currently in auction on eBay for the highest bidder for his casket! 43 MILLION DOLLARS, HERE I COME!!"
:::Reporter gives vain, hypocritical, empty smile to Protagonist:::
Reporter: ... what a noff crime...