Top Definition

A young male who will give up countless hours of his time listening to the problems of his very attractive female friends because they need someone to talk to about their apathetic, Baywatch jock of a boyfriend because no one else will listen or genuinely care. Although always surrounded by beautiful girls the nice guy can’t get a girlfriend or even facilitate the alleviation of certain “drives” because his “ordinary” physical appearance will forever be compared to the Baywatch beach bum’s. The nice guy would never capitalize on a vulnerable girl, objectify or cheat on a girl, he will go out of his way and bend over backwards to help his “friends” and will never ask for anything in return but no matter how intelligent, understanding, humorous, compassionate, trusting or loyal the nice guy is the female cohort will always pass him up and endure any length of abuse, objectification, apathy and cold-heartedness from a man if he has physical attractiveness, fashion, big muscles and chiseled facial features.

The nice guy will eventually realize that his dependability and empathy will never be appreciated and all his friendships with females are all one-sided. This coupled with years of watching girls go for tanned, muscular jerk-offs with nice cars while he desperately hopes someone will realize that how viable he actually is will spawn and incubate the nice guy’s insecurities and he will eventually abandon his views, dumb-down his speech, take-up weight-lifting and switch majors from cancer research with a minor in theoretical physics to playground management so he can devote his time to emulating Baywatch characters and football players so that he will one day be viewed as more than a “nice guy.”

The nice guy will eventually work up the courage to ask out his attractive female friend but will invariably be turned down because she’s so self-centered that she’d never actually had a smidgeon of compassion for the nice guy’s feelings or even realized that he’s interested in girls. After rejecting the nice guy, the girl will downplay the supposed friendship to the point where they never speak again, which in turn will make the nice guy depressed (ironically, he won’t have anyone to talk to) because he’s devoted so much time and energy and has become so warped from being exposed to these kinds of people that he will either live the rest of his life alone in a tiny apartment, jerking off to old Saved by the Bell episodes or get drunk one night and impregnate a 300-pound, cross-eyed derelict who works at Wendy’s and spend the rest of his life being treated like shit.

The whole ‘nice guy’ phenomenon really supports the idea that people primarily care about physical appearances and that shrewdness, selfishness and narcissism will always triumph over compassion, rapport and “inner beauty.”
"Jeez Patrick, I hope I can find a nice guy like you someday."

"Well, if you need me I'll be at home, crying myself to sleep while masturbating to the sound of my 70-year-old neighbors having sex...I might also play some ps2."
by desperryado October 03, 2005
The type of man preferred by normal, psychologically healthy women, such as those who inhabit places like Asia, Latin America, and Eastern Europe. However, the nice guy gets little play from modern Western women, due to them being deranged, mentally ill skanks who enjoy being used and abused by creeps and players.
Nice guys *do* get laid--just not by mentally ill skanks like most modern Western women are.
by sfgnjhsyjnwsrtjhnawr September 28, 2009
1. They finish last.

2. Permanent residents of the friend zone.
Yup, Howard's going the way of the nice guys. He'll never make it out of the friend zone.
by wish303 April 22, 2008
Any man who is kind and respectful. If a true nice guy is constantly rejected, he will take it in silence and walk away. However, this is usually because he is nice but boring. Sometimes, the person can will himself to be more interesting. However, there could be significant factors that play a role like health and family problems.

A common stereotype is that EVERY unsuccessful nice guy must be misogynist or whiny, hence why he doesn't succeed. Oftentimes, the biggest proponents of this view are pretty whiny, judgmental, and very pointy-headed themselves. There are many unsuccessful nice guys out there that have external problems in their lives which prevent them from being interesting. They are just looking for like everyone else, but are held in a negative light by those whiners.
Unsuccessful genuinely nice guy: I have had problems with my breathing and come from a dysfunctional family, making it hard to live a full life. I haven't even kissed a girl, but long for love like everyone else. I'm fine with polite rejections, but I find rude rejections to be overly harsh--

Whiny internet nice guy critic (on blog): YEA WELL MUST U HATE WOMEN AND ARE SUPER WHINY ALL U DO IS COMPLAIN, COMPLAIN, COMPLAIN I MEAN I, ME, AND MYSELF NEVER WINE AND AM XTREMELY TOLERANT AND NONJUDGMENTAL. WOW YOU WANT LOVE, YOU JUST THINK WOMEN OWE U SHIT

Unsuccessful genuinely nice guy: I believe you're being judgmental. Maybe you should get off the internet, breathe fresh air, quit making assumptions, and quit provoking people. Not everyone has it as good as you. Good day.
by atdevel April 19, 2013
The nice guy is the tragic hero in relationships:
He's the one that will stand by a woman all his life, despite the fact the woman will never care for him the way he does for her. She will bitch to him about her failing conquests, use him as a makeshift therapist and shun his efforts to initiate a relationship. Whilst she continues to live in sin the guy will beat himself up over why he has not been able to maintain a relationship, continually asking why his efforts are in vain and why women no longer appreciate gentlemen. When the woman is finally ready to settle down she will crawl back to the nice guy, knowing that he will accept her despite everything because he would do anything for her. Eventually the nice guy realises that his love life has been a hollow victory, and that he would have been better off as the shallow, arrogant jerks the woman pursued in the first place. Sucks doesn't it...

Gentlemen have become a dying breed, because women are not prepared to save them.
Girl 1: All I'm looking for is a nice guy who actually cares about me...
Girl 2: Sure, whatever you say there...
by Firelovesugar March 05, 2011
1. A guy who might very well get laid a ton but will never pleasure fuck someone he knows is vulnerable. A nice guy is just as capable of casual sex as anyone else but he'll give you the heads up.

2. A guy who is usually very handsome and secure enough about himself to empathize with women. He might have problems fitting in for not betraying his values but he persists.

3.A man often derided by ugly jocks and stupid girls who equate the presence of empathy in a person with an absence of confidence.

4. A very cool, profound man who often possesses great artistic gifts. He may grow up to be a rockstar and laugh in the faces of the petty little shitheads who teased him for not fitting in.

5. A man who will kick your ass just as fast as any other if you mess with him but would not dare hit his wife or girlfriend.
That cool rocker was a nice guy who was opposed to sexism with a passion. I'll be damned if he didn't kick that jock shithead's ass though...
by Laertes June 27, 2007
the hardest to find, but greatest to have
girl: did you see HSM, troy is truly a nice guy
girl2:if only we could find a nice guy like him
by Adriana Malik December 30, 2011
A term that a mother uses to describe any single man she approves of and fantasizes about her daughter marrying, but for whom the daughter usually claims to have zero interest in *that* way.

A man labelled a "nice guy" is often a superficially respectful and intelligent, but also frustratingly indecisive or cowardly person who won't get the aforementioned girl because he won't initiate or ask.

Sometimes, the girl dislikes him and finds him boring because he always plays his life safe and fails to go out and accomplish anything interesting with it. (This is why the mother likes him.)

Other times, he is a friend of the girl and desires a relationship with someone, but fails to consider the obvious candidate. (This is the most cliched of romantic-comedy cliches).
Mother: "That guy who dropped you off home seemed like a nice guy."

Girl: "Yeah, I guess."
by fatbloke27 April 22, 2012

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