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A young male who will give up countless hours of his time listening to the problems of his very attractive female friends because they need someone to talk to about their apathetic, Baywatch jock of a boyfriend because no one else will listen or genuinely care. Although always surrounded by beautiful girls the nice guy can’t get a girlfriend or even facilitate the alleviation of certain “drives” because his “ordinary” physical appearance will forever be compared to the Baywatch beach bum’s. The nice guy would never capitalize on a vulnerable girl, objectify or cheat on a girl, he will go out of his way and bend over backwards to help his “friends” and will never ask for anything in return but no matter how intelligent, understanding, humorous, compassionate, trusting or loyal the nice guy is the female cohort will always pass him up and endure any length of abuse, objectification, apathy and cold-heartedness from a man if he has physical attractiveness, fashion, big muscles and chiseled facial features.

The nice guy will eventually realize that his dependability and empathy will never be appreciated and all his friendships with females are all one-sided. This coupled with years of watching girls go for tanned, muscular jerk-offs with nice cars while he desperately hopes someone will realize that how viable he actually is will spawn and incubate the nice guy’s insecurities and he will eventually abandon his views, dumb-down his speech, take-up weight-lifting and switch majors from cancer research with a minor in theoretical physics to playground management so he can devote his time to emulating Baywatch characters and football players so that he will one day be viewed as more than a “nice guy.”

The nice guy will eventually work up the courage to ask out his attractive female friend but will invariably be turned down because she’s so self-centered that she’d never actually had a smidgeon of compassion for the nice guy’s feelings or even realized that he’s interested in girls. After rejecting the nice guy, the girl will downplay the supposed friendship to the point where they never speak again, which in turn will make the nice guy depressed (ironically, he won’t have anyone to talk to) because he’s devoted so much time and energy and has become so warped from being exposed to these kinds of people that he will either live the rest of his life alone in a tiny apartment, jerking off to old Saved by the Bell episodes or get drunk one night and impregnate a 300-pound, cross-eyed derelict who works at Wendy’s and spend the rest of his life being treated like shit.

The whole ‘nice guy’ phenomenon really supports the idea that people primarily care about physical appearances and that shrewdness, selfishness and narcissism will always triumph over compassion, rapport and “inner beauty.”
"Jeez Patrick, I hope I can find a nice guy like you someday."

"Well, if you need me I'll be at home, crying myself to sleep while masturbating to the sound of my 70-year-old neighbors having sex...I might also play some ps2."
by desperryado October 03, 2005

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A whiny little manchild that can't wrap his head around the fact that you don't get rewarded for doing something you're supposed to be doing. Will fall in love with you after one 5 minute conversation and will say you're "not like those other bitches".

Also confused as to what being "Nice" actually means, and is more often than not a horrible, vile human being, that will put effort into treating you like a human being every once in a while, and then throw a massive temper tantrum when he doesn't get his dick wet for doing it. Has almost nothing else going for him and think being "nice" should be enough to get any super model to marry him, despite having no other even interesting qualities. Always runs after women so far out of his league they're not even in the same solar system any more, and then rants about what a cunt she is when she gets together with her hot, educated lawyer/doctor/engineer boyfriend instead of the usually gag-inducingly unattractive and socially retarded Nice Guy.
He said he was a Nice Guy. but when I told him I wasn't single he called me a cunt and now he won't stop sending me these disgusting texts.
via giphy
by notitsmcgee July 18, 2016

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A man who doesn't know how to be a man, can be beta - or omega -
Weak willed, quiet and "nurturing" (like a mother)

Devotes too much time to be a "nice guy", wastes time on the web laughing at memes and sobbing because women go for assholes (assertive males who partake in group activities and have friends as well as knowing what they want), probably out of shape and have no desireable qualities that a woman would look for in a partner.
These people are usually spoil girls by buying them things and listening to everything they have to say, constantly hold out in case the girl drops their standards enough to date them and will tell others how they "love" said girl.

Similar to "bubbly" girls (being fat and unlikeable is optional), nothing nice about them so you just apply a generic word because you can't say they are unlikeable.
"Gary, you are such a nice guy, I wish I could find someone like you (who isn't a spineless little bitch)"
"Date me then, Fiona, I love you and I spend all night looking at rage comics relevant to our situation!"
"But you aren't the one for me"
"What is wrong with me??"
"I'm just not ready for a relationship, sorry"
Fiona then starts dating the assertive guy who has a personality as well as a pair of ears and a wallet, they laugh together about Gary behind his back and the new bf will usually joke to her and his friends about how he is "scared of losing her to Gary", Gary backs off when he makes a move and gets threatened because he turns rapey/stalkerish
by Alpha- April 03, 2014

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They aren't nice they're just really really really desperate if they ever run into a homeless person in need they would simply walk past them .

They usually go after girls who are already in a relationship then complain about how they don't cheat on their boyfriends who are so called jerks by them and not fall for their fake nice guy act or complain about how the girl shouldn't go after the attractive guys like how they go after attractive girls and find that really really unfair

They end up concluding that girls only want to be treated badly when its completely not true.

They ignore the fact there are many many other important traits other than just being nice which are important like being financially stable ,having a healthybody,not drinking or doing drugs, being an interesting person in general, having hobbies other than gaming
,having same similar interests

If the nice guy could just stop trying to emothionally manipulate pathetic girls and try to be a real man by fixing their life up by gaining more hobbies , working out , start being honest , get a good stylist and hair dresser and become finacially stable they could become so happy and satisfied by their fullfiling life and be just satisfied with or without a girl . girls would become mega drawn to a guy like
Girl : my boyfriend just ate my cake hate him so much

"Nice" guy : he is just a bad person if you dump him and go after me I will never ever eat your cake slice I will even give you mine

Girl : its not a big deal

Nice guy: you freaking idiot always going after the jerks this why you will come back crying to me when shows his real face!!
by Mr life advice January 18, 2016

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A Nice Guy is a young or middle-aged male who believes a woman owes it to sleep with him out of gratitude for basic courtesy, like opening a door or not calling her names. Believes only men who look like Abercrombie & Fitch models or possess immense fortunes ever get laid -- or at least, he keeps saying that in order to feel like there are more womanless men out there than there really are. Routinely blames women for his inability to develop and sustain relationships; or to get to a third date even. Frequently tells himself and other Nice Guys that women like to be beaten, raped and called names -- and that's why they (the Nice Guys), cannot get dates. Hides violent pornography under the floor boards. Faced with the fact that none of the women he finds attractive want to date him, concludes that there must be something wrong with women.
Joe is a nice guy, he deserves to get laid!
by SochiKid January 24, 2010

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A loser as in niceguys finish last.
Hey niceguy didn't Amanda dump you for that carsalesman? laugh out loud
by Corwin aka Shannon's bitch November 07, 2003

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Nice Guys (TM) are the guys that make a point of announcing themselves as "nice", and who whine about never getting laid.

Many of the other definitions were written by "Nice Guys".

They're not.

They think they're entitled to sex just because they hold open a door once in a while. They're unsure of themselves to the point they can't manage a declarative sentence. They think strumming guitar makes them deep and they can't understand why it hasn't turned them into a pussy magnet. They are, almost without fail, sexist but tell themselves they're not because, of course, they're a Nice Guy. They tell themselves "nice guys don't get ahead" as an excuse for their own failings. They wrongly believe that women only like jerks, and are deeply bitter about it.

Most women do not like jerks. Women really do like nice guys. But a nice guy is NOT the dude playing gentleman so he can be rewarded with head. The real nice guys -the ones women really do want to date and fuck -are the ones who are genuinely decent human beings. Guys who make a point of calling themselves Nice Guys do not generally fall under this category. And they wonder why they aren't getting any ladies?

So, you fucking internet whiners, how about instead of pissing and moaning about how women never see what a great fella you are and take your pants off all because you took them shopping (you charmer, you!) you actually put some effort into being a real, live nice person instead of a Nice Guy (TM) ?
"Man, ladies only like jerks! I totally took this smokin' hot piece of ass -er, I mean, young lady -out for coffee that one time and didn't even suggest she skip the whipped cream so she could keep from getting fat, and she STILL would rather go out with the dude that treats her like a human being! Nice guys just finish last, I guess."
by MagVik October 20, 2011

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Someone who is really smart, often a 16 year old pursuing a PhD in theoretical astrophysics at MIT. He hears that women say that they want a "nice guy", yet is confused when women are uninterested in him and date simpleminded guys at the bar. This is only because evolution dictates that the physically strong win in the end, which isn't applicable in the 21st century.
Nice guys finish last, but only in high school in college. In the real world, they finish first.
by nicewinsintheend December 08, 2012

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