ned
rite yeez aw go oan aboot neds as in wir scum yeez ir aw just feart ay us coz we wid kick yer cunts in ! neds are fuken minted mate lacoste trakees cost aboot 150 pound stone island jaekts n tht cost aboot 300 poun upwards so dont start yer goth shite aye ther aw scum of the earth wen uz ir aw jst pussies tht say stuff like this or the internet dont get wide ya dick EFTAAAH GON FUR WINE
rite yeez aw go oan aboot neds as in wir scum yeez ir aw just feart ay us coz we wid kick yer cunts in ! neds are fuken minted mate lacoste trakees cost aboot 150 pound stone island jaekts n tht cost aboot 300 poun upwards so dont start yer goth shite aye ther aw scum of the earth wen uz ir aw jst pussies tht say stuff like this or the internet dont get wide ya dick EFTAAAH GON FUR WINE
by ycf ya bam December 22, 2005

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ned
a smelly tramp who drinks a lot and feels tough in a crowd . Will pick a fight if you walk in their air zone and will pick a fight if you dont

female neds get pregnant at 8 and have 30 children by the time they are 12.

male neds will sleep with ugly female neds who probably have a gold ring up their cunt.

Neds wear lots of cheap jewellery made by an immigrant

Neds are unemployed but still manage to survive

I will wipe them out in due course
Am no a ned ya pure bas
by Steven October 28, 2004

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ned
noun: The smoldering end of a cigar, cigarette, joint, blunt, or other oblong smoking material.
Also: ned marks, ned tracks, ned burns: burns in furniture and automobile upholstery.
(SW Indiana, US)
"Watch your ned dude! You fucking burned me!"
"No more smoking in my car, you left ned tracks on my seat."
by Vandervecken April 25, 2009

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Ned
Iam from Glasgow and it means a young scumbag, council house, non educated, white shell suit (fake designer gear) usually a fake tan although the furthest they have ever been is jail. from the word rob there granny for a drink
a wee ned was seen drinking buckfast up a lane
by Clive October 08, 2003

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Non
Educated
Delinquent

Most commonly used in the north of scotland (Edinburgh/Fife) it can be used as an offensive word (1),description of a gathering of young people (2), Or a general representation of all Sweatsuit-wearing, load talking, slang using Alchoholics in scotland (3)
Example of N.E.D

(1) "Aye right you wee fucking ned, I will fuckin shag your maww!!

(2) "Look at all those neds hanging around tesco"

(3) "lol all those scottish folk are neds!"
by FifeyBoy April 01, 2009

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Ned
Hang about in parks and housing estates modelling their finest track-suits, Berghaus jackets and Burberry cap aimed at the moon. A bottle of Buckfast in one hand and the other usually down the "trackies" of a female companion, The female ned dresses in the same atire but has a "tango" coloured face, white arms and an arse as wide as a taxi with a thong cutting through a sweaty layer of flab.

Older neds are called "Mad Tramps" or "Smelly Bastards" wear track-suits, white trainers, smoke roll-ups made with Drum tobacco and think its right the state foot the bill for their inability to earn wages because they are too stupid to even count their own fingers, barely able to make the toilet, yet could cover 100m faster than Usain Bolt to catch an ice cream van for "a boatle o ginger", Drum rolling tobacco and/or 20 Mayfair, a powercard and a 20lb bag of boiled sugar for their 8 month old "wean" for his dinner.

Smoke anything if it was brown, even shite if someone called it hash. And if they are not buying it, they are selling it instead.

Neds houses all appear to be decorated and furnished by the same person also (??) and are filled with, either stolen things or cheap tat, bought with ten-thousand billion percent hire purchase from Shitehouse and a stereo with only cd's of smurf-sounding rave music blasting, or Pink Floyd for the more cultured ned. Ugly, fat and pishy smelling at worst and avoidable at best.
Jeeves: I didn't get into that establishment. By jove one is miffed!

Wooster: Gadzooks! Why not, Jeeves my good man?

Jeeves: Because there was a roudy-rabble of rather inhebriated neds talking to me in the queue, one can only presume the door fellow assumed me as their companion.
by tommy-the-hat February 09, 2010

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ned
A ned is a Scottish term for a male between the ages of 8 and 19 who enjoys wearing cheap, usually fake tracksuits, Kappa or Lacoste trainers, white football socks over their tracksuit bottoms, and of course a fake Burberry cap pointed skywards. They may also be seen wearing Helly Hansen of Berghaus jackets, depending on weather conditions.

Favourite pastimes of a ned include smoking anything they can get their hands on, drinking Buckfast ("Buckie") or cheap cider, such as the "White Lightning" crap you can get out of the Spar for £1.50 a litre, starting fights with random people, although never alone, they always start fights in groups ("Crews", "Fleetos" or "Yung Teems"), and shagging the female of the species, coined a "Nedette".

A Nedette is similar to a ned in both attire and pastimes, but instead of a normal Burberry cap, they wear pink Burberry caps, they have around 12 fake gold hoop earrings on each ear, and are usually accompanied by their screaming, butt-ugly toddler, to whom they gave birth at the age of 12.
Traditional Ned Battlecry:
Ned(to passing stranger):"Oi you ya bam. You bein' wide?"
Stranger:"Er......no?"
Ned:"Aye ye are. You deserve a slap"
Ned hits Stranger
Stranger:"What the f*** was that for?
Stranger hits Ned back
Ned(pulling out bread knife):"Me an' ma Crew 'ill f***ing wreck you!"
Stranger runs, pursued by 5 Neds with kitchen knives
by CaptainToast January 02, 2009

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ned
A Scottish person who uses slang and vandalises.. Basically a chav but not english.
Girl:Oh my god that Ned just vandalised the park

Random person:Oh dear those neds live in a bad neighbourhood.. nothing new there.
by Boris Wenis November 06, 2008

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