Tenors: "We can sing the female parts"
Scholarly choral director: "Excellent. Ladies, that will be all see you next year. Musicology is practicology I always say."
Sarah Brightman: "If I sing like a boy soprano for this Requiem, that makes performance correct right?"
Maestro: "If you sing it in tune and without your wobble. The musicologists would much enjoy it."
Anna Netrebko: "I read a singing for dummies book that says opera singers must sound older. Should I sing like that to be historically correct when singing L'Orfeo?"
Musicologist: "Yes...the neo-expressionism of the blah blah--somewhere on a train to hackensack...the dividend of 42...later that evening when I arrived home...musicologist of the week....and that is why opera singers should sound mature."
Anna Netrebko: "I'm so glad it's okay to sing really far back in my throat so that I sound more mature and no one understands a word I'm saying!!"
2. Musicology Ph.D. student: "Did you know that Joseph Matthias Kracher was on friendly terms with Michael Haydn?"
Intelligent Human: "Big fucking deal! Who cares?"
Musicology Ph.D. student: "Well, Kracher wrote two settings of the 'Te Deum.' What have you done to contribute to the advancement of Western Civilization?"
Intelligent Human (grabbing student's throat and choking him to death): "This!"
Musicology Ph.D. student: "Gakkkkqq!!!"
music major: "No way! I'm not that intense about music. Also, I want a job when I graduate. If I'm really rich when I retire then I'd love to get an MA in Musicology, but not now."