Morning glory
A male condition commonly experienced in the early morning, making it self apparent as the said male is preparing his breakfast. Symptoms include swelling and chaffing, with common results being catching and banging certain afflicted members of the body against obstacles. Condition may worsen, causing endless sadist mirth in onlookers, such as the girlfriend, dad, acquaintances or (god no) grandmother of said tortured male. Their are only two known cures, with the only viable one being ice, as the other is impossible to implement due to stiffness of the knuckle and elbow joints in the hands and arms that is usually an issue at such an hour of the morning.
Billy: Oh no!

Unfortunate Onlooker: Holly fuck!

Billy: Not morning glory!

Unfortunate Onlooker: Ha ha! What a looser.

Billy: I suck!
by Sam Wren May 27, 2007
Trying to force out a very large shit in the morning, since the process is slow and eats up time like a boss you decide to flood the sink with hot or cold water and stick your hand in the sink until your shit has slid right out your butt hole.
"Broski, i love my Morning Glory"
by MikeyB A Baller October 13, 2011
The act of waking someone up by ejaculating on their face.
"Dude, my roommate slept in and didn't give me a ride to work, so I have him a Morning Glory. For some reason, he's really pissed at me right now."
by 1-uptheguy April 09, 2009
a batched bowl of some sweet budd hit and enjoyed in the morning by all.
Yo pack me a morning glory bro!
by imsizzle December 12, 2010
After awaking with a massive erection, masturbate until near ejaculation. Then gently wake up your girlfriend, wife, or transient hooker and commence ejaculation in their barely open eyes.
Wife: Did you just..? Oh my God its everywhere, my eyes are burning! You asshole!

Husband: Behold the beauty of morning glory!
by luc richard mbah amoute April 13, 2009
Using the dreaded morning wood for good and masturbating first thing in the morning.
I hate having a morning wood, the only time it comes in handy is when I feel like having myself a quick "Morning Glory".
by Twunce March 14, 2010
Waking up with an erection and a huge need to pee.
"Dude, I hate morning glories, I am trying to sleep, I wake up one sec and I've got a huge fucking boner and need to pee."
by Soiled Undergarment August 18, 2003
Waking up with a cock as hard as steel.
My girlfriend loves it when I have a morning glory and shove it up her ass while she's still asleep. After she wakes up and put my hand on her perky little tits, she rides my dick as hard as she can till I almost cum, then she licks my balls and gives me a blow-job. When I cum she swallows every last drop and plays with my dick till I'm stiff again and she fucks me till lunchtime.
by bjmaniac July 16, 2010

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