The nasty, sweaty, slimy and stinking mess that is your crime scene after a particularly heavy night. Usually the state of them will offend even yourself, and you are often in such an extremely hungover state that you have missed your opportunity to shower that day. The only cure is to scrub thoroughly and treat with Gold Bond. This can have various causes such as: 1)dancing all night, allowing for a sufficient coating of sweat to turn rancid while you sleep; or 2) after a night of particularly excessive sexual exploits, the 'maturing' of 'love fluids' on the affected area.
Today is probably one of the worst days of my life, I've got a beastly hangover, don't have any of the right books for my lectures, and a killer case of morning after balls. Can I borrow your shower?