my best friend in the whole world. No matter how much we argue, shes always there for me and listens to me. the woman who spent hours in the hospital trying to "lay a fricken bowling ball" after nine months of me kickin her in her sleep and wakin her up and makin her cry for no reason and makin her want to eat the house down without gainin a pound. She is the woman who doesnt care how much i cry on her shoulder and how sopping wet with tears and snot her shoulder gets, she will always listen to me tell her about how "BoB likes CiNdY instead of me." she teaches me that you can still be happy without the world in your back pocket. She teaches me that beauty is in the eye of the beholder and that i should always respect others, even if they do not respect themselves and others back. she teaches me that i am always loved, and she will always be there for me. she is the woman that i can still sit in her lap and will be able to until im 50!!! -because she loves me that much- she is the woman who told you how great your concert went even if you messed up over and over and over again. she is the best person that you can ever meet.
*might i add that your mom doesn't have to be the woman who gave birth to you. she can just be the woman who supports you and cares about you.*
all of the people who refer to their mom's as "bitches" and "whores" and other disrespectful names need to think about all that their mothers do. respect her because she does more for you than you will ever know.
Billy bob broke up with Sara sue. sara sue's mom stayed up all night listening to how he just wanted to be friends and then she saw him holding hands with Curly cue five min. later.
some women go through labor for like two days straight! think about that, 48 hours of pain!!! no matter if she is a good mother or not, she went through that for you!
The woman who loves you unconditionally from birth, the one who puts her kids before herself and the one who you can always count on above everyone else.
Just telling her your problems makes you feel better because mom's always know how to make it all go away.
Even if you fight, know that she's just looking out for your best interests.
Where would you be without your mom?
someone who gave birth to you.
"Luke...(breath) I am your mom."
The constant flow of cash and ass whoopings until the age of 18.
Dude my mom kicked my ass when I blew snot all over her new dress.
word of the day: May 13, 2007
An affectionate term for your mother.
"I was talking on the phone with my moms."
A manipulating, self-centered bitch. EXTREMELY hypocritical and illogical, my mom will do anything to win an argument. She belittles you, makes fun of you, puts you down, all in order to get her point across so she can be the "dominant" one. Sunny and sweet outside, and maniacal and cold at home, she's a backstabbing racist old-fashioned who exaggerates things waaay to much, again, so she can win an argument. I cannot tell her ANYTHING about my life without her critisizing me or making me feel worse. She uses her children to show off to other parents, something she can be proud of and brag over the phone. She's ignorant and superstitious and emotional and lame. I am only grateful for her giving birth to me, and feeding me.
Not all mothers are like this; just a few. I just wanted to post a definition where mom isn't the most wonderful woman in your life.
1) Her: Mexicans and Blacks are lazy.
2) Her: God, your friends are such sluts! They can use tampons already? How can they use tampons, unless their hymens are already broken, meaning they must of had sex! Whores!
3) Her: Look at your sister, sitting in her room, reading a book and studying! Look at what YOU'RE doing.
Me: I read almost everyday and get straight As!
Her: Well, you read too much!
4) Her: You have not accomplished anything this year! You are a loser and you will never make it in life! The only reason you aren't failing at school is because of ME.
5) Her: *nag nag*
Me: Hold on, I'm on the phone.
Her: *continues nagging*
Me: Be quiet Ma, I'm on the phone!
Her: Don't tell me to shut up! Such disrespect! I can do whatever I want to, nag nag...
ONE WEEK LATER....
Me: Mom, I need to go to the library to check out some-
Her: SHUT UP, I'M ON THE PHONE!
6) Her: You cannot dye your hair! Once you do, you will become a bad girl and start having sex with random strangers!
Me: How can hair color determine your behaviour?
Her: Look at all the people who have green hair!
7) Her: You mean the Earth revolves around THE SUN?!?!
I swear, all of these anecdotes are true. She has caused me severe psychological damage; bad self image, low self esteem, depression. I wish I had your mother instead.
the number 1 butt of moronic jokes
1. The hardest and lowest paid, but most rewarding job in the world.
2. A intimate, familiar, and loving name to be called (by your kids).
1. Of course I work, I'm a mom! And I have another job, too!
2. When you go through these hateful phases, I just remember the first time you called me "Mom", and it doesn't hurt so bad.