MIL to her own sisters: "i hate my daughter in law..she can't even do things half as good as I can. i told her that I don't care if she doesn't love me cuz she's just an outsider"
"What? Where? Huh?"
"Sexy 'b' pushing the stroller... I've got to rub it on and against her, crotch-wise..."
"That Mom, I'd scissor the piss out of her... that's what we'd do - knock back an 18-wheeler of High Life's, scissor, then hit the road on my Honda Valkyrie and talk LPGA all the way from Ocean City to Bakersfield... "