2. phrasal synonyms: "in a transparent closet", "flying under his own gaydar", "rafting down d' Nile", "thinking his Zima is a Guinness"
"What metrosexual Bruce likes about dating Linda is that it doubles his wardrobe, he saves money on skin cream, and she brings home drunken guys so he can blow them."
MALE FRIEND ONE: How come Bruce is missing the game?
MALE FRIEND TWO: I don't know. He said something about "a sale at Express"...?
MALE FRIEND THREE: What's "Express"?
MALE FRIEND ONE: It looks like he's gone metrosexual. It's only a matter of time before he introduces us to a "special friend."
MALE FRIEND TWO: Aw, man. Just last week I heard him say something about how "pink is this year's fuchsia."
MALE FRIEND THREE: What's "fuchsia"?
TRISHA: Things are getting weird with Bruce. You know, ... in the bedroom....
ASHLEY: Uh, oh... But he's got such cute hair and you guys like to go shopping together. I'm sorry, sweetie. I thought - except for fighting over closet space - you guys had a real thing, there.
TRISHA: Yeah. He seemed more in touch with himself. Different from most guys. But, the other day he said he wants to "try something a little different."
ASHLEY: Oh... Like with Rick? Just tell him he has to make do with one girl at a time.
TRISHA: No. No, it's different. Um...
ASHLEY: I know. You're scared, but go ahead and do the anal thing. All guys want it. Just get some lube and make him go slow. He probably won't be that into it that much anyway, after he tries it.
TRISHA: No. I'm not afraid of the anal sex. Well, not exactly, anyway...
ASHLEY: Well, don't leave me hanging, here. What's got you so freaked out?
TRISHA: He wants me to wear a strap-on.
ASHLEY: Sure, so you just... You just... Waitaminute - a strap-on? You mean, like, for him?
TRISHA: Uh huh. I think he's a ... a metrosexual! <breaks down sobbing>
ASHLEY: Jeezus! I told you you can't trust a man with thirty pairs of shoes....
1. You just can't walk past a Banana Republic store without making a purchase.
2. You own 20 pairs of shoes, half a dozen pairs of sunglasses, just as many watches and you carry a man-purse.
3. You see a stylist instead of a barber, because barbers don't do highlights.
4. You can make her lamb shanks and risotto for dinner and Eggs Benedict for breakfast... all from scratch.
5. You only wear Calvin Klein boxer-briefs.
6. You shave more than just your face. You also exfoliate and moisturize.
7. You would never, ever own a pickup truck.
8. You can't imagine a day without hair styling products.
9. You'd rather drink wine than beer... but you'll find out what estate and vintage first.
10. Despite being flattered (even proud) that gay guys hit on you, you still find the thought of actually getting intimate with another man truly repulsive.
Person 2: "No, he does dress well, but he has a wife"
Person 1: "Oh, he must be metro then"