Some people makes jokes about paying money to have an IQ test administered and then paying more money in annual dues just for the right to be in such an organization. I make those same jokes and I'm a member (It does make for good resume fluff and I will confirm that it has helped when my potential employers knew of the organization). The conversations are agonizing and the Mensa Bulletin (monthly magazine) runs a high probability of making your eyes bleed.
The best part about being a Mensa member is knowing someone with about 130 IQ and calling them "normie" (cute term for those with normal intelligence. Get it?! Ha...) and talking down to them.
Entrance to the organization requires a professionally administered IQ test with a result showing the taker to be in the top 2% of the population. For those without any previous qualifying tests, Mensa administers two tests ($30, which really isn't terribly bad for a professioanlly administered and graded test). A 98th percentile passing grade is only needed on one of the two tests. Scoring 99th percentile doesn't earn any kind of cool decoder ring, though, much to my dismay.
Mensa members are frequently found with useless degrees like an Ed.D. They do this to be called "doctor." It's easier to get an Ed.D. than it is to get a real doctorate, but it requires less "useful" knowledge, and no one will have to know!
The Simpsons episode about Mensa was flawed only by their letting Lisa in. Lisa is 7 years old and, therefore, too young to be a member. Mensa also doesn't just hand out free memberships! You'll get your free Mensa membership around the same time the Scientologists stop charging for whatever it is that they do.
"A guy walked into a bar with a lizard sitting on his shoulder. He said to the bartender, "A double whiskey for me and," pointing to the lizard, "a half-pint of Guiness for Tiny here."
"Why do you call him Tiny?" asked the bartender.
"Obviously," the man answered, "because he's my newt."
If you don't understand the joke, you have failed the admission test in advance. Please send me the $30 via Paypal and try again later.
True: Mensa is an organization for people with high IQs. Their requirement for entry is that their potential members must score within the top 2% in their standardized intelligence test.
False: Unlike some people would have you believe not all Mensa members are snobbish assholes. Also, their meetings are not just about academic endeavors . Many of them know that being extremely intelligent can be socially awkward so their meetings are a chance for these members meet other socially awkard intelligent people and do normal everyday things that regular "Schmoes" like you and I would do.
-Asia Carrera (famous pornstar)
-Geena Davis (famous actress)
-Jodie Foster (do I need to explain?)
On their "Join" page, there's a cute video of Leif Gantvoort telling you how easy it is to get into Mensa. He smiles, saying, "I will get into an argument with my wife and she'll call me an idiot -- that's when I whip out my Mensa card," proving to the world that he is a shaggy haired-walking pair of dick and balls. He brings another fellow ball of 19 year old afterbirth on the screen, who says that all members teach. This seems promising until dick and balls drops a load on the it, saying sarcastically, "I'm pretty sure it's a coincidence her last name is 'Wise.'"
An Asian cuckold appears on the screen, the "Mr. Mensa" of 2010. This creampie-eating dick and balls licker is so gracious that amazing people like Peter Bainbridge, a prominent Mensa member who is most often remember for referring to people with IQs of 60 as "carrots" (effectively insulting every disabled individual or individual with an actual moral code), his friend. You should be glad that you'll get some friends, because I promise you that when you join Mensa, you'll need them.
"Mensa has over 200 Special Interest Groups, from biology to psychology!" "That's incredible! I've heard that the Internet has over 7.5 billion groups tailored to your interests, from molecular biology in a cabin made from spruce logs to the psychology of snuff films when shown to kittens. Plus, you get the same experience of being ruthlessly lied to about accomplishments!"
"I'm sorry, you're denying me access to this VIP event? Maybe you haven't seen my... ...MENSA CARD?!" "My apologies, sir. I recognize that you are an extremely important individual because you have paid to be in a club that advertises as being 'easier than ever' to enter. Here, take this cat o' nine tail whip to lash me forty times as I kick out Bill Gates from his luxury box and fetch you some champagne. After all, you are one of the most elite forms of humans- a member of Mensa."
"God-doesn't-exist, I have been declared the chosen one! Mensa has selected me for their top-secret exclusive organization! This is a once in a lifetime chance! Now all I have to do is wait for my check to clear." ~Every Mensa Member Ever
"Wow, Bob, you joined Mensa? Funny, I thought you'd be smart enough to know that money can't buy you friends."