22
When someone is a massive drip i.e sitting down in the hallway in college and playing tetris on their phones like the little neeks they are.
Friend: Have you see that kid sitting down in the hall way?

Me: What a fucking Melvin.
by TheMike3331 January 23, 2017
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23
A type of person, the melvin (noun) is half characterized physically, and half emotionally and by their demeanor. It should not be confused with a nerd, geek, or a person, because it does not have a soul.

The debate of whether one is born a melvin or it is an onset condition still rages on. Most research shows that melvins were actually born with souls, but through their incessant self-pity and self-loathing and miserable lives, they actually exile their own souls from their very bodies, which i will describe next.
(Essentially, they are born with souls, but their terrible genetic features lead them to certain doom, and thus the condition is in genetic limbo.)

The melvin form employs the most unfortunate of human physiques. The melvin is a physically (as well as mentally) feeble person, down to his lack of sufficient muscle tissue, weak bones, small frame, and feeble voice. The melvin has pathetic, sloping shoulders and disproportionally short arms, that broadcast his lack of confidence and competence. Baby fat (not to be confused with fun fat - which has at least one merit) is present in many melvins, but is not essential to melvinhood. Often it occurs only in the midsection, leaving short skinny limbs and face, giving a physique similar to McDonald's "Grimace" character, the big limbless purple thing with a hooker addiction.

Melvins are typically worthless members of society, as they spend most of their time whining, pitying themselves, and sucking at life.

some refer to the female version as a "she-melvin."
These tend to be more rare, and as the gender line can be very hazy with melvins, it is safest to stick to the simple "melvin" nomenclature.

The adjective form, "melviny," is also appropriate in describing such characters.

pop culture references:
South Park season 3 episode 8, "Two Guys Naked in a Hot Tub." Stan is forced to play with some melvins at an adult meteor shower party.
Steve: Dude, that guy really must suck at life.

Dave: Yeah, he was so pathetic that I don't even feel bad, because he felt bad enough for himself for all of us.

Steve: Yeah. Textbook melvin....
by saltybawls June 25, 2009
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24
when someone grabbs another rguy by the front waist band and pulls up.
i was just coming out of the bathroom at school when a group odf my friends come in and brian kicks me in the balls and gave me a huge melvin then they draged me in the girls room and left me hanging on the back of the bathroom door and took my clothes when it ripped i was so emmabarassed they had took all my clothes.
by kyle f July 13, 2006
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25
a severe frontal wedgie. usually the result of horrible practical jokes or freak accidents.
"Man this tandem bike sure is giving me one ridiculous melvin. I got bruises!"

When you fall on a ski slope and your dad tries to help you up by putting his ski pole between your feet. (people slide downwards on hills. it's not funny.)
by Victim of Melvin May 14, 2009
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The vengeful act of crapping on a lover's chest while they sleep.

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26
Direct synonym of camel toe, but more polite. A frontal feminine wedgie. When the fabric of tight pants lodge up in the labia, creating what looks like a split hoof.
God damn, whenever Emily wears those pants it's melvin city!
by salty ballz July 30, 2006
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The vengeful act of crapping on a lover's chest while they sleep.

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27
A nerd who does weird and random things for no reason.
Did you really sit around home last weekend? your such a melvin.
by tommy dizzle May 09, 2005
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It does not matter how you do it. It's a Fecal Mustache.

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28
That last strike was a f***ing melvin
by MPH25 August 23, 2008
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It does not matter how you do it. It's a Fecal Mustache.

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