| 1. | destroy | ||
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The point where you are so fed up with your high-speed computer being stupidly slow because of all the viruses you've picked up, half of them being virus-stoppers themselves, that your anger bursts and you ultimately DESTROY your computer's monitor, and kick the computer section underneath to death.
Friend: "What's wrong?"
Friend at computer: "My computer's being TOO F-ING SLOW!!!" Friend: "Why don't you walk away?" Friend at computer: "BECAUSE IT'S TOO F-ING SLOW!!!" Friend: "???" Friend at computer: "I CAN'T TAKE THIS ANYMORE!!! ARGH!!!" Friend: "Dude, calm down." Friend at computer: (looking insane)"Must... destroy... AAAAGGGGHHHH!!!" *throw heavy magnet at monitor in frustration, then kicks that crap out of the computer box* |
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| 2. | macintosh | ||
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The 10 reasons that Apple must think is imperative for making the change from a PC to a MAC can be found on their website. Of course if you have the time to read through all of them you realise that these 10 features or reasons have been standard with the PC a long, long, long time. Some of the reasons are just plain myths that Apple invented. Probably because they ran out of fabricated facts.
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So take the journey through the 10 commandments of a mac-enthusiast and enjoy their naive attitude towards personal computing. 1. The Mac... It just works This is maybe the ultimate reason a mac owner will give you to explain why it's superior to a PC. The mac owner will tell you that all people that own macs are really satisfied with their computers and would never switch back. This is ofcourse not true. The mac owner will also tell you that with a system from Apple you will never have to think about drivers, upgrades or anything. A mac is perfection itself when delivered. Atleast according to their standard. Many macs can't even be upgraded. So what you buy is what you get. Expect your system to be outdated within 1-2 years. Apple also states: "Only with a Mac do you get an operating system built by the same people who built the computer it runs on.". Actually Apple's Mac OS X (the operating system) is not based on their own technology, but by the technology of freeBSD. Apple's own capabilities in form of creating an operating system have been demonstrated in previous ve... |
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| 3. | Macindouche | ||
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an elitist retarded person who gladly and enthusiastically pays a ridiculous amount of money for sub par computer and entertainment equipment despite having numerous better and less expensive options because they believe every completely false and semi-false claim made by Apple/Macintosh Inc. or they want to be able to sit at the genius bar and feel superior as they try to use their computer even though they don't know what the fuck they're doing so they ask one of the staff persons at the store who, of course, don't have an answer except that maybe they should try buying some upgrade or apple care or other useless add-on which the douche willingly does without thought or question...they just stare at that glowing half-eaten apple
see also: iDouche Macindouche: Hey check out my new mac.
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Smart person: ...cool? Macindouche: Yeah it's got a 1.8GHz processor, 2 gigs of RAM, bluetooth, wi-fi, it's ultra cool Smart person: How much was it? Macindouche: (some ridiculous amount of money) Smart person: I just got a pc for half that price with twice as much power. Macindouche: Yeah but this thing is awesome, it can do video editing, I can watch movies, listen to music, it's ultra top of the line. Smart person: Yeah my pc does all that too. Macindouche: Yeah but I can like plug anything into it and it will work, like an mp3 player, a digital camera, external hard drive, external superdrive... Smart person: Yeah me too. What the fuck's a superdrive? Macindouche: It can burn cds AND dvds. Smart person: Oh you mean a combo drive, yeah my pc has one on it. You had to buy an external? Macindouche: Yeah I bought an external but it's more than a combo drive, it's a superdrive. Smart person: What does it do other than burn cds and dvds? Macindouche: It plays them too. Smart person: All burners play the media they can burn. Macindouche: ...huh? Smart person: Nevermind. So does it do anything else? Any reason you spent so much on it? Macindouche: Yeah, it can't get viruses. Smart person: Yeah it can. Macindouche: No, macs can't get viruses. Smart person: Then why did it come with virus scanning software? Macindouche: ...in case one day it can get viruses. Smart person: A computer can eventually lose its featur... |
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| 4. | iDouche | ||
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an elitist retarded person who gladly and enthusiastically pays a ridiculous amount of money for sub par computer and entertainment equipment despite having numerous better and less expensive options because they believe every completely false and semi-false claim made by Apple/Macintosh Inc. or they want to be able to sit at the genius bar and feel superior as they try to use their computer even though they don't know what the fuck they're doing so they ask one of the staff persons at the store who, of course, don't have an answer except that maybe they should try buying some upgrade or apple care or other useless add-on which the douche willingly does without thought or question...they just stare at that glowing half-eaten apple
see also macindouche iDouche: Hey check out my new mac.
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Smart person: ...cool? iDouche: Yeah it's got a 1.8GHz processor, 2 gigs of RAM, bluetooth, wi-fi, it's ultra cool Smart person: How much was it? iDouche: (some ridiculous amount of money) Smart person: I just got a pc for half that price with twice as much power. iDouche: Yeah but this thing is awesome, it can do video editing, I can watch movies, listen to music, it's ultra top of the line. Smart person: Yeah my pc does all that too. iDouche: Yeah but I can like plug anything into it and it will work, like an mp3 player, a digital camera, external hard drive, external superdrive... Smart person: Yeah me too. What the fuck's a superdrive? iDouche: It can burn cds AND dvds. Smart person: Oh you mean a combo drive, yeah my pc has one on it. You had to buy an external? iDouche: Yeah I bought an external but it's more than a combo drive, it's a superdrive. Smart person: What does it do other than burn cds and dvds? iDouche: It plays them too. Smart person: All burners play the media they can burn. iDouche: ...huh? Smart person: Nevermind. So does it do anything else? Any reason you spent so much on it? iDouche: Yeah, it can't get viruses. Smart person: Yeah it can. iDouche: No, macs can't get viruses. Smart person: Then why did it come with virus scanning software? iDouche: ...in case one day it can get viruses. Smart person: A computer can eventually lose its features? iDouche: I dunno, maybe. It doesn't matter... |
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| 5. | mac n chack | ||
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A way of saying mac n cheese to boost your level of cool. People with little to no coolness will say "macaroni and cheese," those with average coolness will say "mac n cheese," and those who are overwhelmingly badass will say "mac n chack." Best if repeated several times. A: oh, what should I have for dinner?
B: mac n chack! mac n chack! A: Hey, dude, you forgot to clean the dishes... could you maybe- B: mac n chack! mac n chack! A: you know what? You are so cool for saying macaroni and cheese that way that I will do the dishes for you. B: hell yeah, mac n chack. A: Man, I've used all my moves on her, but she hasn't bit. I'm starting to get a litle worried. B: well, have you cooked for her? A: well, yeah, I mean, yesterday I made homemade mac n cheese for her, and- B: see, theres your problem A: what? B: You're calling it mac n cheese. You'll get some for sure if you call it mac n chack A: oh, hey, thanks man! |
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| 6. | Giggle Biscuit | ||
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Giggle Biscuits are biscuits that contain Weed in them. These Biscuits are a sneaky way of getting blazed. When taking Giggle Biscuits around they place you should pack them tight in a container. The smell is quite strong so be careful as your parents may get a bit suspect. Giggle Biscuits make a good combo when combined with Burt the couch Giggle Biscuits take about 1-2 hours to kick in so when you are eating them, try have aprox 3. If nothing is happening after 2 hours eat ALL the rest like the Cookie Monster until you can see God which means you are tripping because he is not real, unless you have been on the "Giggles" Example 1 more...
Levi: Hey want to come around to mine tonight? Emilie: Yer sure, I've got some "Giggle Biscuits" if your hungry. Levi: They better have the icing this time! If I wanted to eat cardboard I would goto Mac'rs Emilie: Well soz Levi but we aren't all Soft Cocks like you. Levi: LOLOLOLOL they are kicking in and I'm only thinking about them. Example 2 Mrs Kenny: Man those biscuits smell funky, what recipe did you use Emilie? Emilie: Oh just one of mlgpro.com Mrs Kenny: Oh yer, Slaughtr Destny/Carl lives on that site. I think he wants to be Tsquared. Carl: Yo quit hating nubcakes this is my time to shine! Man I'm hungry, Emilie chuck us a Giggle Biscuit pl0x Emilie: Here have 3, see how you can take it. Carl: Well if they had icing it could be slightly edible but pfft guess I better man up Emilie: Maybe I didn't put enough plural/weed in there. Carl 2 hours later... |
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| 7. | Computers | ||
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-plural, contracts "Comp(s)"
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-Hardware+Software -Desktop or Laptop, new forms of hardware emmerge all the time -What TV shows producers and academy awards ancient voting base(for Oscars) are too old and incapable to know anything more about than "where net is" -Many thorough idiots think we should care to maintain our hardware, but it's a underdeveloped technology if it endangers itself just by being on(I'm talking dust, humidity and heat, the natural stuff that can damage your hardware over time) -Are the future whatever they use next, be it another basic material, light or quantum comps, hell, your next console/PC/phone might work as a cloud computing platform. (consult OnLive) -Every OS has its tricks/ways, cons and pros -Experinced users can controll their system faster and more efficiently because they know their shortcuts, hotkeys and tricks Current categorization by OS/pseudo-religion: Windows |
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