God's real name, or more accurately, the name of the real God. Mateus accidently created the Universe and humanity during his campaign against The Zombies. This is regarded by many as his greatest mistake. Currently resembles a cynical, annoying 16 year old in the U.S.
Mateus: "I'm sick of everyone worshiping that Jesus guy - my name's Mateus damn it. I'm bored - anyone know where I could find a good hooker?"
A magical jew fairy who does some trippy shit. Likes to frequently troll. It is unknown to the world but Mateus is the biggest skux of all time.
"Oh hey Mateus, hows it going?"
"Pretty average, only scored about 300 CHICKS!...................