| 69. | masturbation | ||
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The act of 'touching' oneself in order to feel 'pleasure'. Something only done by the very lonely and desperate. One of the least attractive things one can possibly do. Guy: Hey. I tried to work on my masturbation problem.... I couldn't resist the urges.
Girl: -gags and resists puking- ehhhhh.... you must be so lonely. No wonder you can't get a friggin girlfriend. Guy: Dammit |
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| 1. | Masturbation | ||
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The act of touching oneself to produce a favorable feeling in the groin area. Usually accompanied by some sort of mental, visual, or audio stimulation to assist in reaching climax.
jerking off; spit-shining the old water pump; waxing the brass candlestick; beating off; playing cards with only one hand on the table; riding the quarter-horse; joining the mile-high club, solo-aviator division; giving in to the hand police; self-actualization; fully realizing your potential No honey, I don't want to tonight, I'm tired from watching Oprah. Why don't you just go masturbate?
That dumb broad got me all worked up and left me; so I had to spit-shine the old water pump manually if ya know what I mean. Sometimes, when I wake up, I have an erection, so I have to beat off until it goes away. Sometimes, it comes back so I beat off again until it goes away. Once, it kept coming back so I just chopped it off. It hurt bad. |
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| 2. | Masturbation | ||
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Mass murder of millions of tiny defenseless sperm. If hitler was into masturbation instead of murder all the millions of deaths would not upset the world.
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| 3. | masturbation | ||
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The act of sexualy pleasing oneself, usually to orgasm. Masturbation is the best exercise I get all day!
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| 4. | masturbation | ||
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Manual stimulation of the penis of vagina to produce a stimulation simular to actual penetration by a member of the opposite sex.
It's something most of us have been caught doing, never admit to doing, and know full well that everyone else does. Woody Allen: "Don't knock masturbation. It's sex with someone that I love."
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| 5. | Masturbation | ||
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"Practise sex" If masturbation were a sport, I'd be a jock.
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| 6. | Masturbation | ||
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something guys cannot get out of habbit. Time for my daily jerk!
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| 7. | Masturbation | ||
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Playing solo on one's organs.
by
anonymous
Mar 9, 2003
add a video
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