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1. Moose Massage
When going to Boy Scout camp, the older scouts have to initiate new underlings into the troop. Thusly, they perfrom a "Moose Massage" which involves lying the recipient on their stomach, climbing onto their body, and humping their ass while wildly gesticulating in the air with your left hand. No not your right. Repeat back and forth motions until the underling moans like a moose, which signifies he is a true Boy Scout.
Hey Evan, come to my tent.

Alright Jason, what are we gonna do?

Get down on the fucking ground bitch!

Whaa..

Time for your moose massage bitch!

Yeeeeeeeeeeeeehaw! Ridem cowboy!

NGHGNGNGHHGGBN!!!!

Ok your a Boy Scout now.
2. chest massage
A style of massage used on females breasts and chests. It begins with a gentle rub down of the upper chest, and collar bone. Then continues down to the outer rib cage, and under the arms, AROUND the outer edge of the breasts. From there work your way UNDER the breasts, and push firmly, and up into the lower part of the breast that hangs down when the female is upright. Then proceed to firmly rub the outer perimeter of the breast, where the breast begins to protrude from the chest, with your fingertips, circling around the perimeter. Be sure to give the cleavage some attention, rubbing up and down between the bosoms, and sliding with moderate pressure. Then place your hands firmly on the lower rib cage about 3-5 inches UNDER the bosom, and repeatedly squeeze firmly, and rub the lower rib cage with a fair amount of pressure. Work your way from that to cupping the females bosom in your hands and pushing on them with moderate pressure, being sure NOT to cause discomfort to the woman. When the breast is compressed firmly, proceed to make multiple minute movements with your fingertips, a sort of squeezing motion. This part of the massage should give the woman pleasure, and possible climax. Now return to the edge of the bosom, and begin a circular motion working up the breast with your fingertips gently stroking and rubbing NOT pushing in (the female breast is sensitive, and pushing in with your fingertips may cause the female pain, or aching), until you reach the nipple. When ni...
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3. Nametag Massage
A nametag massage is what happens when someone has a nametag clipped near there privates and they sit down. It rubbed against the genitals causing excitement.
Renise: God i'm so tired. I'm going to sit down. AHHHH!
Gail: What happened?!
Renise: Oh, it was just a nametag massage
4. Thai Massage
A very nice massage, usually given with copious amounts of oil.

Once you strip naked in front of a 17 year old thai masseus, you lay down on a bed where she proceeds to give you the best massage of your life.

Towards the end of the massage, you'll be prompted to receive a "sexy massage". At this point she'll negotiate a price with you, ranging from 12$-15$. keep in mind, this is Thailand where its perfectly legal to sleep with a 12 year old but deathly illegal to smoke marijuana.

After the negotiations are complete, you'll get the best damn fucking handjob ever.
Boyfriend: Hey babe, can you give me a Thai Massage?

Girlfriend: Gross no i wont fulfill your sick Asian fantasies..
5. Proper Massage
A "proper massage" is one given to a lover, seductee, friend with benefits, or someone you simply want to see naked, which is the one and only rule for this type of massage; the person receiving the massage MUST be naked.
Baby, you so fine, I want to give you a proper massage.

Dude, your girl is all wound up, how long has it been since her last proper massage?
6. Text Massage
What happens when you have your phone on vibrate and is in your pocket and you get a text, vibrating on your genitals and giving a very good massage.
Angela was sitting down, and randomly got a text massage from her dad.
7. Gate Massage
August 4, 2011 Urban Word of the Day
A TSA pat-down with a "happy landing."
I got a gate massage at the airport today. I feel great!
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