Top Definition
What straight couples have legally and commonly don't want, and what gay couples don't have legally and commonly want.
Irony in the first degree.
by raspberry (lust) muffin May 27, 2005
A failing institution people believe will seal their love for each other, or help cut their taxes.
First comes love, then comes marriage, then comes debt, arguing, divorce.
by definingmyworld September 22, 2008
an outdated custom in the world today, that is fully supported by an archiac concept known as religion.

For some reason more and more today men seem to be the one's putting unbelievable pressure upon themselves to get married, when the actual outcome of the act itself has little to no benefit to men. Its basically agreeing to become a woman's new father, so her real father can finally say "Congratulations!" (translation: now she's your problem!). The stigma being its better to be in a marriage (even if you and your wife havent had sex in years, resent each other, and have kids that are a mess) then to be a single, middle aged man.

This definition has yet to take into account "divorce", which deserves a definition all its own, but since marriage leads to divorce needs to be mentioned with it.
George: Wow, so Steve got married huh?

Bill: Yeh, marriage after dating her for 4 months! You should hear him go on about it.

George: Go on about what?! He now gets to enjoy sex with the same person all the time. Thats like me bragging about the banana I have for breakfast every morning and how it gets better and better.

Bill: Hey I hear ya, I didnt understand it either. Good luck to him.

George: I mean if you rushed into it, I'd understand that, any woman willing to marry your gremlin ass you gotta run with, but Steve.....

Bill: You got me there, but that still doesnt explain what the hell I was thinking in banging your sister, least I pulled out and got her in the face for good measure.

George: I hear ya, like when you go outta town and I go to your gf's, its like a shooting gallery, and she's got a target right on her face.

Bill: Fuck you and your whore sister.

George: Not as much as I fuck your gf, bitch.

*Bill and George start kissing*
by Fatty Fat Face December 18, 2012
A binding contract between a man and a woman to remain faithful to each other until death,usually taken in front of family,friends,etc but is still binding in front of a judge or pastor.

To have a succesful marriage,take "divorce " out of you vocabulary.
When jenny and sebastian got married they eant "this marriage will last until we die"
by Knight_of_7 September 28, 2010
A religious civil union of two persons;
A legal union for the protection of children
In most European countries, no religious ceremony is recognized by the state. (True separation of church and state.) Therefore, all church weddings occur only after a state ceremony.
In the Netherlands, even gays may marry by the state even though the church doesn't recognize it.
After a couple's marriage, all children born are considered to have automatic declaration of paternity.
by anne treasure, St. Croix, VI September 06, 2007
A God-ordained union between a man and a woman.
Marriage--And a woman shall leave her mother and father and cleave herself to her husband.
by OneHeart432 January 04, 2012
Its after you live with a woman for 8 years, And you have had sex in every room, Every position, In every park and department store change room. You give her a ring and say I DO. What that really means is I DONT have sex anymore. All your freedoms is gone, and she controls everything you do.
I masturbate more now, then before my marriage.
by DittmerDan November 13, 2014
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