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1.
What straight couples have legally and commonly don't want, and what gay couples don't have legally and commonly want.
Irony in the first degree.
by raspberry (lust) muffin May 27, 2005
 
15.
Marriage is that wonderful time in the lives of two people where they demonstrate their love and devotion to each other. After the ceremony, the new couple will go somewhere nice to bang. Then it all goes to Jahannam. First wifey will quit work to watch Lifetime (one of many Feminazi channels). Then she will slip up and spill the truth about why she was a virgin going to the honeymoon destination and wasn't when they first fucked. Then it will come to light that she was under a mountain of debt from Payday loan(sharks) and keep bitching until he gets a second, or third, job. Then he'll have to get out some payday loans to pay her payday loans or even less sex for him. Then, while he's working all the time, she'll be banging the mailman, her boyfriend, the cable guy, the internet guy, and any other guy but her hubby. This hell goes on for about two years. Then comes the blissful stage known as divorce. This is the time the truth comes out (the shit hit the fan when they left for their honeymoon) and she bitches about how she "had" to fuck everyone but her dearest husband since he abused and neglected her, working when he should have been home. After that torment, comes the alimony stage. So in the end, he's got 25% of his paycheck, none of the account (she got to it first), and just enough for a shack downtown and a tranny hooker (all the real girls were her best friends and probably coworkers). Meanwhile lil' wifey will have two new husbands and countless fuck buddies. Have fun.
In short, marriage is the worst ass fucking possible.
Usually.

(p.s. This actually happened to my dad)
by WTF Mate? May 15, 2007
 
16.
To most people, it begins with a grand confetti-filled ceremony, but sadly, usually ends in divorce and the like.

So, taking contemporary relevance into consideration, Perhaps the most accurate definition of 'marriage' is:

"I know im crazy in love with you right now, but when these high emotions leave and it's just you and me left, I promise that I'm going to stay with you, belong to you, protect you and love you... I wont leave you or break this promise (even if you do bore me sometimes down the track)."
"If we're going to consider marriage, we'll have be prepared to make the commitment... forever."
by Angelface May 11, 2006
 
17.
The sacred and legally binding prelude to divorce.
The marriage of Carmen Electra to Dennis Rodman, the marriage of Tom Cruise to Nicole Kidman, the Marriage of Brad Pitt to Jennifer Aniston etc, etc, etc,
by nethcev! August 17, 2006
 
18.
One's (specifically my) opportunity to finally come together with the girl he loves, and spend the rest of his life with her. Protect her, love her, raise a family with her, and generally enjoy each other until the day they die.
"I love Kara more than anyone on the face of this Earth. I yearn to marry her. Our marriage will be magical" -Matt
by Baby B0y September 16, 2007
 
20.
What you should do when you are over 60. This makes sure that you wont get on each others nerves for very long.
Dorothy and Jon had a short marriage he died at 73. She barely got to know him.
by ItsMillyTime August 02, 2007
 
21.
For many, the phase of a relationship in which delight turns to disappointment and romance turns to resentment. Then she turns to her girlfriends and he turns to drink. Presently they turn on each other. He turns to a mistress, she to a divorce lawyer. Their home turns into hers but their mortgage turns into his. The sons turn into junkies, the daughters into teenage moms. And that's the bright side, because in many cases that's as close to a turn-on as marriage gets. Unless you're very, very, VERRRRY careful, and willing to wait and wait and WAAAAIIIIIIT for a truly exceptional person to enter your life, AND for real love between you to grow. A marriage founded on that rock-solid basis still has only a 50/50 chance of success (i.e. boredom) or failure (i.e. the tragedy described above), because marriage often changes people, leaving you shackled to a stranger. Yet that's as good as life's going to get, kid. Suddenly the Navy doesn't sound so bad, does it?
Marriage should only be attempted by those blessed with incredible luck.
by Stranded in Paradise February 06, 2008