8
To most people, it begins with a grand confetti-filled ceremony, but sadly, usually ends in divorce and the like.

So, taking contemporary relevance into consideration, Perhaps the most accurate definition of 'marriage' is:

"I know im crazy in love with you right now, but when these high emotions leave and it's just you and me left, I promise that I'm going to stay with you, belong to you, protect you and love you... I wont leave you or break this promise (even if you do bore me sometimes down the track)."
"If we're going to consider marriage, we'll have be prepared to make the commitment... forever."
by Angelface May 11, 2006
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9
What straight couples have legally and commonly don't want, and what gay couples don't have legally and commonly want.
by raspberry (lust) muffin May 27, 2005
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10
Marriage is that wonderful time in the lives of two people where they demonstrate their love and devotion to each other. After the ceremony, the new couple will go somewhere nice to bang. Then it all goes to Jahannam. First wifey will quit work to watch Lifetime (one of many Feminazi channels). Then she will slip up and spill the truth about why she was a virgin going to the honeymoon destination and wasn't when they first fucked. Then it will come to light that she was under a mountain of debt from Payday loan(sharks) and keep bitching until he gets a second, or third, job. Then he'll have to get out some payday loans to pay her payday loans or even less sex for him. Then, while he's working all the time, she'll be banging the mailman, her boyfriend, the cable guy, the internet guy, and any other guy but her hubby. This hell goes on for about two years. Then comes the blissful stage known as divorce. This is the time the truth comes out (the shit hit the fan when they left for their honeymoon) and she bitches about how she "had" to fuck everyone but her dearest husband since he abused and neglected her, working when he should have been home. After that torment, comes the alimony stage. So in the end, he's got 25% of his paycheck, none of the account (she got to it first), and just enough for a shack downtown and a tranny hooker (all the real girls were her best friends and probably coworkers). Meanwhile lil' wifey will have two new husbands and countless fuck buddies. Have fun.
In short, marriage is the worst ass fucking possible.
Usually.

(p.s. This actually happened to my dad)
by WTF Mate? May 15, 2007
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11
1.) Point at which a male's opinions become utterly worthless.
2.) Point at which a male must spend weekends at the Mall
3.) Point at which a male must buy hundreds of shoes from italy
4.) Point at which a female stops working due to getting knocked up, thus forcing male further into the pits of hell
by jethro January 16, 2004
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12
In the USA: Legalized slavery for men. Legalized "you can do no wrong" for women.
Marriage gave her all of the power and me all of the responsibility. If I spoke out against this, I was a rapist or a murderer. I guess I am forced to stay married or go to jail and lose my house and kids.

by jethro January 03, 2006
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13
A sure way to kill 95% of a woman's sex drive.
Justine and I usta make like rabbits all the time. Now after marrying her I'm lucky to get laid one or two times a week.
by Amos Bwatt September 16, 2004
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14
What you should do when you are over 60. This makes sure that you wont get on each others nerves for very long.
Dorothy and Jon had a short marriage he died at 73. She barely got to know him.
by ItsMillyTime August 02, 2007
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