look up any word, like the eiffel tower:
 
8.
After the act of either anal sex, vaginal sex, behind the knee sex, and/or being BLOWN, the man removes his penis and with a slashing motion, during the release of his baby yogurt, slaps the female continuously across the facial area. This creates a flowing stream of white goodness that showers the females face. The man also has the option of screaming "Machete" as he is bringing down the cum hammer.
Dude, I got pissed at your mom yesterday so I went ahead and gave her a Machete. She then had the biscuits to say that she wanted another. Dude, your mom loves the cock!
by Fat Cobra & Stunt Man Mike May 04, 2007
 
1.
A knife with a handle longer than most blades, and a thin, long, staight-edged blade. Used for hacking away at foliage in front of the weilder.
Hello, my name is Jason Vorhees, I wear a hockey mask, and I am a machete-killer addict
by Gumba Gumba April 12, 2004
 
2.
spanish word for fucking big ass knife
dude isnt that fucking big ass knife you have a machete
by vayne arelius February 13, 2010
 
3.
a long knife, used for hacking your way through the jungle. also the most awesome zombie killing tool ever.
Shit, theres zombies outside. wheres my machete
by ltdelicious May 03, 2009
 
4.
Something you pull on 10 guys wanting to jump you in the parking lot of a BP. Usually with an 18 inch blade and a thick hard plastic handle.
*Van pulls up and a gaggle of people jump out*
Jesse: Are you the fuckers I am supposed to whip the shit out of?
Me: HEY! Fuck you guys you are bringing 10 guys?!!? Well, this makes it even Jesse, Me, and this machete
*Van pulls away with quite a quickness*
by P. Kaltenbach January 11, 2008
 
5.
A chunk of sharp metal fitted with a handle that would cause any poor bastard a world of pain
did you know jason has a machete
by RET September 21, 2004
 
6.
Machete is the most bad ass movie ever created. It is about Machete, and ex-Federale who is a legend to all Mexican-Americans, being betrayed by a company who hired him off of the street to assassinate Senator John McLaughlin. All out war is declared and Machete's Mexican-American army kick some fucking balls off. Also includes Lyndsay Lohan's tits.
Guy 1-Dude! Did you see Machete?

Guy 2- Hell ya! I jerked off so hard to Lindsay Lohan's tits!
by skown February 18, 2011
 
7.
when a man is about to ejaculate, he pulls out of her anus and in a chopping motion slaps the girl in the face as he is ejaculating.
hey dude, i got pissed off at your mom yesterday so i went ahead and gave her a machete.
by fat cobra April 27, 2007