look up anything, like your first name:
1. Corporate Doublespeak
If you have ever had a credit card company lose your payment you have probably experienced corporate doublespeak.

A good example; You get a late notice from your credit card company. Instead of paying the minimum you pay the entire account off. Afterward they keep sending late notices and making phone calls. You phone them, you e-mail them, and you even send letters by snail mail to them.

All responses you receive from them are in lawyer language. They admit nothing and say nothing that makes any sense except to say that you are late with your payment and you will be reported to the credit bureau. Then mysteriously two weeks after payment had been sent electronically to them the payment posts and the calls end.
Wife: Why are we still getting those calls from the credit card company?

Husband: I paid them off a week ago but they say I did not. I have called them and e-mailed them. At first they act like I am lying. Then after they keep me on hold for a long time their tone turns cautious and they start talking in corporate doublespeak.
2. vig
1)tribute to a mafia boss.
2)a percent expected to be paid back from a loan.
3)the juice or cut to be lost or refunded(by winning) in gambling.
1)"Fats" wants the vig by next monday.
2)that loan shark "Shorts" wants his full payment back soon.
3)the vig on the mets, sox game is 10%.
by x Feb 25, 2004 add a video
3. skyline chili
Simply put, the worst job that any human being can ever take...where you start out making a handful of shit for payment, and smell like fry grease when you go home.
Manager: Yeah we need you to come in and work all day Saturday and Sunday since we lost some guy who just quit...

Me: I hate this place because I smell bad and make no money.
by dfried8 May 14, 2005 add a video
4. Deltona
Overcrowded and under developed, Deltona is home to crazy mean old people, new young families, wanna be "gangsta" teenagers... and most importantly, deranged lunatics.

Deltona is a huge sprawling area of winding streets that lead to more winding streets that lead to more winding streets. The neighborhoods are as mismatched as the people, with shacks falling down next door to huge, weird looking 2 story homes. You can find the poorest inhabitants of this city zipping around town in their souped up BMW's, gas guzzling SUV's, or Mercedes... because even though they can't scrape together enough money to pay the electric bill they have no problem coughing up $450 for a car payment.

There is nothing to do in Deltona. Young families flock to "Dewey O", the local park, like wildebeest to a watering hole. Old people go door to door, soliciting their religion. Teenagers spend the majority of their time vandalizing things, smoking things, snorting things up their noses, or beating the living hell out of one another.

With a Walgreens on every corner, you'll never have to do without your pharmaceuticals.

The best part about Deltona is that you never know what you'll get killed for. Maybe over an X box? Maybe over the way you looked at that guy at the gas pump? Or maybe just because someone felt like it.



"If you get lost, make a series of right turns. You'll always end up at a major roadway."

Deltona: Home of the 2004 mass murders
5. Scandinavian Hatchback
A process of sending mail in Scandinavia. You must insert your mail and a payment of 10 acorns into the hatch in the rear of a donkey and pray the donkey does not get lost on the way to its destination.
- "I've paid my morgage 5 times this month but it always gets lost in the mail."

- "Have you sent it by Scandinavian Hatchback?"

- "That's exactly why it got lost."
6. friendship fees
When an acquaintance has worn out their usefulness and must pay a monetary sum for the relationship to continue being mutually beneficial.
"How come we don't talk anymore?" "You were no longer worth my time last month. Pay the friendship fees or get lost."
7. Ghost Transfer
Work Place Related (When reading consider your field of business and the different departments that handle each call/field) The job of the receptionist is to gather information from client (answer their questions/make appt/or get said client to the right department rep)

When performing duties at place of employment, the receptionist at said employer receives then immediately proceeds to transfer a phone call to you with no regard to topic matter or point of contact of client. (Done as Ghost, no point of origin) This said call is done blindly meaning the call does not have an origin of who has transfered this call to you. No information is given to person about to receive this phone call prior to receiving call. Many times the caller hasnt even finished explaining what they need help with. Receptionist is in such a rush to get off the phone that they don;t take the time to consider caller/clients needs. Once this initial GHOST TRANSFER has been initiated the original caller is lost in transfer cyber space.

All in all this is poor customer service. If the receptionist had listened to caller originally; their concerns would have been addressed. For the person that received the GHOST TRANSFER they would have received about 5-20 minutes of wasted time. POINT IS- do your job and listen to what the client is needing. The front line phone employees are business first impressions................they may be the last
Receptionist: Greets client and asks them how they may help?
Client: I was calling to schedule a service appointment for my vehicle? (gear towards your field law, doctor, dentist, etc)
Receptionist: Ok, hold (Please realize it is their responsibility to record all information regarding an appointment or intake into your place of business)

Receptionist then proceeds to transfer this call without gathering anymore information to a completely different department. (someone who doesnt handle this type of call)

This in fact was a ghost transfer .............blind siding the unsuspecting person

Clients initial response after they have been GHOST TRANSFERED

"They just transferred me without telling me they were doing so"
"I'm looking for so JANE DOE" (NOT YOU OBVIOUSLY)
"I was holding for (a different department name)"
"I just needed to make an appt" (one of two duties they have. Taking calls and making appts)
" I just needed to know what your hours were(come on if a receptionist cant answer this then let them go)"
"What brand do you service?" (Now this product is referring to the name on your building, if the receptionist doesnt know this then.......I dunno)
"I was wondering if you guys had a car wash"
"I was wondering what type of payment you accept" If you dont know this then we shouldnt be issuing you a check come pay day

Just a few examples of the GHOST TRANSFER after effects
more...
rss and gcal