106
Crappy computer software that isn't compatible with anything.
Jenny: facebook does not agree with my computer
Hovan: y?
Jenny: it's a linux
Jenny: nothing agrees with my computer
Hovan: boo
by divegrl6 August 18, 2009
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107
You have two cows.

The city council demands that you disect one of them and allow the town citizens to do whatever they want to it.
The town citizens use genetic modification to enhance choice organs.
They take several days to re-animate the cow, until they finally have a working zombie-cow that produces SuperMilk (similar to Popeye's spinach) but random organs stop every 10 seconds, forcing the people to disect it again just to fix it.

You live happily on your regular milk while the town struggles.
No, this Linux diatribe isn't copypasta.
I'm just as astounded as you.
by DonZabu November 03, 2008
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108
A kernel made by Linux Torvalds; a product of consumption of an hilarious amount alcohol.
<oppstoppersnopp>Linux is the best
<femilh>STFU, or I'll rape your mother with a Hitlerjügend-knife
<oppstoppersnopp>But Linux is the best!
<femilh>No, BSD is the best.
<oppstoppersnopp>No
<femilh>Yes
<oppstoppersnopp>No
<femilh>Yes
<oppstoppersnopp>OK ALREADY! BSD RULES THE FSCKING EARTH!
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109
The operating system* little boys employ in a vain attempt to appear computer-savvy due it's perceived complexity, which is really just a convoluted user interface stemming from the lack of higher cognitive ability found in Loonux 'programmers'.

As with any underdog**, you will find a horde of fumbling zealots defending Loonux, who, rather than pose arguments with a rational and verifiable basis, will simply parrot ignorant statements against the operating system(s) that put Loonux to shame (e.g, Windows). More often than not, these lower beings will resort to childish name-calling and irrelevant technical references which further compacts their own ineptitude.

* "Linux" as referred to here is of it's derivatives based on the Linux kernel.

** Windows currently holds 94.3% market share vs Linux's < 1% (As of May, 2009)
If you're ever in need of a guideline on how to write sloppy, inefficient, spaghetti code, then see: linux.org
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110
A operating system whose only superiorities versus Windows is its server stability and ability to be altered by its code, because its open-source software. Windows cannot be altered like this because learning C++, then butchering Window's code is illegal.

Windows is used by a common computer user who has no interest in running gaming/website servers or being a programmer. Windows is much more compatible, almost everything except Unix/Mac software. Windows is also made by capitalist pigs governed by a monsterous irresponsible behemoth called Bill Gates who failed to completely debug its software in the first place and only does something when somebody personally mails him a death threat.
The linuxers program, and the Windowers use. Enough said. Maccers, I don't know, don't care, only Space Command units use them for their ability to do math better than our common shit PCs.
by Chang Tan October 26, 2003
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111
Steve: Have you heard about Bob? He uses Linux.
Dave: What a douchebag.
by Kriyze January 29, 2014
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112
A program that provides the classic setup for a monopoply: undersell and demonize your competition, then raise prices sharply when there are no other alternatives.
You soon will not be allowed to use a computer if you are not using Linux.
by Arcpibtn Meaas December 08, 2003
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