Top Definition
An extremely obese woman. More commonly known as a BIG BITCH. Often seen cruising buffet lines or getting smashed by guys who are hard up for some pussy. Much like a real whale, there is a lot of blubber and they secrete grease and oil. They often smell like stale fish although they rarely go in the water.
Hey man, did you see that land whale Mike was messin' with? I told him to watch out, now he went and fucked up and got that bitch pregnant. That's messed up.
by 210 Playa April 15, 2010
A person who is obese and has a big enough overhang to shelter a moose.
Wow see that fat kid over there... he is a land whale.
by Offrey J May 16, 2006
A glutton that is so fat that she is unable reach back to wipe her ass or perform other basic hygiene.
Members of NAAFA, Big Fat Blog and other fat acceptance organizations.

You had better get to the buffet before that landwhale does.

Those Wal-Mart scooters must be built like tanks because they can handle some really big landwhales.
by The Real Fat Bastard February 12, 2008
The big blobs of people who can't move and get crushed by their own weight.
Did you see that land whale on TV last night?
by Master_stghm October 11, 2005
Man or woman over 300 lbs.
The best land whale watching location is the Wal Mart near you.
by leeky10001 April 02, 2009
Obese person.

Unmotivated, fat cunt of a person whose weight is the result of pure laziness.
*Those who're obese as the result of medical problems not included.
"Look at that fat cunt. What the fuck did he eat?! England?"
"Nah mate, that's just a land whale. Careful, they eat humans."
by RabidIrishman May 15, 2013
A landwhale is the typical femenist, a bitch who is incredibley obese and thinks that women should be supperior to men even though they claim to want equality.
Guy 1: Have you seen that new femenist group at school?
Guy 2: Yeah, they're a bunch of landwhales.
by CoolGuyHasChillDay September 16, 2014

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