A person who gets sexual satisfaction from writing up lab reports. They are typically found in their rooms typing the report with one hand and jacking off with the other. Most of them are proficient one-handed typists.
There is often a manic compulsion to do lab reports, even when alternative activities include free food, free bowling, free movies, free booze, and sex.
Sean, what are you doing? We got vodka and naked chicks in our room!
Sorry guys, but this lab report isn't going to DO itself! Giggity.
Fuck you Sean, perverted labophile.