Arnold Schwarzenegger stars as detective John Kimble, a man who has been chasing a drug dealer named Cullen Crisp. When he finally tracks Crisp down, he learns that the only way he can put Crisp away is by having his ex-wife testify against him. Kimble finds out the name of the school Crisp's son attends. He is then assigned a new partner, Phoebe O'Hara, who is going to go undercover as a kindergarten teacher, and the two travel to Astoria, Oregon. Unfortunately for Kimble, O'Hara becomes ill, and the only person who can take her place is him.
"WELL I'VE GOT NEWS FOR YOU, YOU ARE MINE NOW, YOU BELONG TO ME!"
"I'm Detective John Kimble. I'm a cop, you idiot!"
"IT'S NOT A TOOMAH!"
"Boys have a penis, girls have a vagina."
"My dad is a gynecologist. He looks at vaginas all day."
"Who is your daddy, and what does he do?"
"Stop whining! You kids are soft. You lack discipline."
Ah-nuld (to little kid): Are these all your lunches?
(Boy shakes his head no)
Ah-nuld: You mean you eat other people's lunches?
(Boy nods his head yes)
Ah-nuld (yells): STOP IT!