To kebab, one must have a monster cock to impale a selected female... through both ends... simultaneously. The unique and often painful act derived from the widely exercised practice that is known as spit roasting - or commonly 'spitting' which requires two impalers and one impaler. This closely resembles a rotisserie cooker or 'spit roast' a common delicacy amongst greeks. Coincidently, wogs and guidos account for the majority of spitters (impalers) and spitties (impaled) in todays society.

The act originated in the small island state of Tasmania, south of mainland australia. Whilst spit roasting commonly requires 3 participants, Tasmanians, whom are renowned for their two heads and monster cocks, have contrived the efficient and comprehensible method that allows spitting to occur with only one impalie.

Initially spitting emerged as Tasmanian technique that allowed the two headed impaler to take part in the act of spitting with out the feat generating what is known as a gang-bang.

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The act of rotating your body slowly around a heat source in cold weather, in particular mushroom heaters, in order to get an even distribution of warmth across the body.