look up any word, like blumpkin:
Anyone who a gentile decides is Jewish is a Jew. It doesn't matter whether they practice Judaism or have never entered a synagogue. Since the birth of Christianity, being a Jew means to be personally responsible for the death of a rabbi named Joshua, better known through his name in Greek, Jesus Christ. The New Testament takes what was largely a political dispute with a renegade rabbi while Judea, a Roman province, was under military occupation and turns it into a blood libel with no expiration date. A Jew born today will be considered by the gentile world responsible for the death of Jesus. Since Jews have historically been persecuted dating from their dispersion by Rome in 70 AD and thereafter by the Christian world, they are understandably mistrusting of non-Jews, fiercely independent and have learned that education is the only commodity which is truly one's own in any event. Jews are characterized by an excess of pessimism, while they await the next Holocaust and a wicked sense of humor, best known as gallows humor. An example of which is provided below.
Lenny Bruce once said that all his life all he ever heard from gentiles is "The Jews killed Christ." Bruce said he never really believed it until, one year, he bought a house in Lake Ronkonkama, NY which is on Long Island. On the day he moved in, he went down to the basement to clean up. Behind an old bookcase he discovered a note. Bruce read it. It said, "I did it" and it was signed "Morty."
by Haman Jr. April 02, 2008
Someone that was born to a Jewish mom or converted his religion to Judaism.
That person is not always Israeli, not always white, and not always believes in god!!!
The Judaism is a religion and also a nation.
All the stereotypes about Jews are right in the same way that Christian people can be cheap and big-nosed, which means it's not right about all the Jews.
If someone, for some reason, thinks that I'm wrong- please tell me why.
I'm Jew, and I live in Israel, so every word I've said-
I guaranty- is true..and that's for sure
sorry about the spelling and grammar mistakes
John: My father is Jewish
Tim: it makes you a Jewish, no?
John: no, a Jew is someone that was born to a Jew mother
by Hadas V March 06, 2006
People who belong to one of the oldest religions in the world. Often discriminated against for things that they've never done (as protrayed in several of these other definitions). Did Jewish people kill Jesus? No, that was the Romans, but there were Jewish people in the act. Fine. But that was people a couple thousand years ago. Not me. Not my family.

We are white, black, asian, hispanic, you name it. It's offensive to call someone a jewbag, a kike, or anything of the sort, no matter what you think. Contrary to popular belief, not all Jewish people have huge noses, curly brown hair, and are really cheap. Guess what kids? There are Jews with blonde hair and blue eyes. Just. Like. You.

In fact, Jewish people are just like you, with the exception of the fact that we do not discriminate against everyone else, we do not believe Jesus is God's son,a nd we have a rabbi, not a priest. 'Nough said.
Yeah, We're Jews. What're you going to do about it?
by You-Dont-Wanna-Know April 07, 2006
k...lets get this strait

1) a 'Jew' is a person from a cultural group...most are from eastern Europe.
2) some one who is 'Jewish' has a mother who had Jewish parents...whether or not they practice Judaism.
3) Jew can or cannot be offensive. depends on who your talking too.
4) not all 'Jews' are rich, stingy with money, and all those stupid stereotypes...if you going to be a neo-Nazi.... DON'T LIVE IN AMERICA
Just look at her last name...she must be a Jew.

"She looks Jewish!!!!" "so? her mother converted when she married the Christan guy"

America my be a free country, but some one has to manage the money....why not the Jews?

the coolest people on earth
the best part about being a jew is the food!
by goodoldpancakedude December 24, 2007
The "real" jews, descendants of the Hebrews, Abraham, Jacob, Moses, from the Old Testament, were annihilated for the most part during the first century A.D.

99% of "white" jews we see today are actually descendants of Khazars, a pagan race that used to live in Khazaria (name changed to Russia today). These Khazars converted to judaism around 740 A.D. The white jews are NOT the blood descendants of Abraham, Jacob or Moses, from the Old Testament. For more info please do some research and read a book called "The Thirteenth Tribe" written by Arthur Koestler, himself a Khazar.

It is sad that the Khazars (who call themselves jews today) are so ashamed of their real ancestors. Shame.

"White jews are descendants of Khazars, a pagan race that used to live in Khazaria (named Russia later)."
by rachelslight February 12, 2007
A name for people who are part of the Jewish religion, It is a RELIGION and is not a race or group of people out to get you so for the ignorent people that have decided that they 'hate' Jews, one of your close friends are likely to be jewish and they probably dont even know themselves.
Jews are a bunch of amazing, beautiful people and i love them.
Remember; being jewish is a BELEIF and therefore cannot look a certain way.
The list of Jews are endless, if anyone wants to get rid of jews then maybe you should realise that so many of the people you watch on telly, so many songs you listen too, so many people you admire are infact jews.
EG. Simon Cowel, Zac Efron, Sharon Osbourne, Amy Whinehouse, Einstein, a guy in west life, there are just too many to name.
by Emily Georgina Scotts June 22, 2009