look up any word, like donkey punch:
 
171.
People who belong to one of the oldest religions in the world. Often discriminated against for things that they've never done (as protrayed in several of these other definitions). Did Jewish people kill Jesus? No, that was the Romans, but there were Jewish people in the act. Fine. But that was people a couple thousand years ago. Not me. Not my family.

We are white, black, asian, hispanic, you name it. It's offensive to call someone a jewbag, a kike, or anything of the sort, no matter what you think. Contrary to popular belief, not all Jewish people have huge noses, curly brown hair, and are really cheap. Guess what kids? There are Jews with blonde hair and blue eyes. Just. Like. You.

In fact, Jewish people are just like you, with the exception of the fact that we do not discriminate against everyone else, we do not believe Jesus is God's son,a nd we have a rabbi, not a priest. 'Nough said.
Yeah, We're Jews. What're you going to do about it?
by You-Dont-Wanna-Know April 07, 2006
 
1.
jew
1. Someone who practices Judaism.

2. Derogatory term for someone tight with their money or someone not very generous.
1. Kyle from southpark is a Jew

2. You jewish bastard, lend me a cig!!
by matt November 13, 2003
 
2.
Jew
A group of people comprising 0.002% of the world's population yet drawing unproportional amount of media coverage (especially Israeli Jews).
The world is obsessed with Jews. Therefore, the world should get a life.
by sdhgdhdtjhdfjnmfdyjfry November 22, 2006
 
3.
The only people in the world that are simultaneously hated by both the extreme Left and the extreme Right.

Synonym: scapegoat
"The Jews killed Jesus!"

"The Jews control Hollywood!"

"The Jews caused 9/11!"

"The Jews oppress the Palestinians!"

"The Jews ran over my poodle!"
by Harvey Mama March 03, 2005
 
4.
Jew
A person of the jewish faith.
by Rabbi Dude November 04, 2003
 
5.
jew
A southern bastardization and contraction of the two words "did you".
Jack: "Hey Steve, jew fuck Stacy last night?"

Steve: "No, jew?"

Jack: "No."
by Carl Pickens March 20, 2007
 
6.
jew
Let's Clear up some of the Misconceptions in these postings.

A Jew is a person who's mother is Jewish. (Some streams of Judaism argue that Jewish patrimony can be acquired through the father as well).
Jews are not a race but an eclectic mix of different races, nationalities, and cultures; they are a truly multi-cultural and multi-ethnic people. However, within this mix, there are distinct ethnic groups such as the Ashkenazic and Sephardic Jews that make up the overwhelming majority of the Jewish People.
Most American Jews are of Ashkenazic origin -- usually originating from Eastern Europe or the former Soviet Union. Therefore, American Jews could largely be classified as an ethnic group, hence the characteristic stereotypes, although there are exceptions.
A Jew is not a person who practices Judaism, although most Jews do adhere to some form of Jewish practice or cultural tradition.
A Jew is not an Israeli and an Israeli is not a Jew. An Israeli is a citizen of the state of Israel. While most Israeli's are Jewish, there are also non-Jewish citizens of Israel.
A Jew is not automatically a citizen of the state of Israel. A Jew must apply for and be granted citizenship to the state just like everyone else, although most are awarded citizenship rather easily.
Larry King's parents were Ashkenazic Jews. Therefore, regardless of whether Larry King practices Judaism or not, Larry King is an Ashkenazic Jew.
Larry King is not an Israeli citizen.

by NAteshot March 05, 2006
 
7.
jew
1) someone who practises judaism

2) is also a culture/ethnicity, that is to say it has a certain sense of humour, certain type of food and music etc.

3) A person who Mel Gibson talks smack about after he has had too much to drink.
"Jews are responsible for all the wars in the world."
by Clubned August 02, 2006