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155.
jew
A person who practices the religion of Judaism; A person whose anscetry dates back to the ancient jewish kindoms; a member of a superior race who is hated for his superiority and success; Me!
"...If statistics are right, the Jews constitute but one percent of the human race. It suggests a nebulous dim puff of stardust lost in the blaze of the Milky way. properly, the Jew ought hardly to be heard of, but he is heard of, has always been heard of. He is as prominent on the planet as any other people, and his commercial importance is extravagantly out of proportion to the smallness of his bulk. His contributions to the world's list of great names in literature, science, art, music, finance, medicine, and abstruse learning are also away out of proportion to the weakness of his numbers. He has made a marvelous fight in this world, in all the ages; and had done it with his hands tied behind him. He could be vain of himself, and be excused for it.

The Egyptian, the Babylonian, and the Persian rose, filled the planet with sound and splendor, then faded to dream-stuff and passed away; the Greek and the Roman followed; and made a vast noise, and they are gone; other people have sprung up and held their torch high for a time, but it burned out, and they sit in twilight now, or have vanished. The Jew saw them all, beat them all, and is now what he always was, exhibiting no decadence, no infirmities of age, no weakening of his parts, no slowing of his energies, no dulling of his alert and aggressive mind. All things are mortal but the Jew; all other forces pass, but he remains. What is the secret of his immortality?"
by #1Jew May 14, 2005
 
1.
jew
1. Someone who practices Judaism.

2. Derogatory term for someone tight with their money or someone not very generous.
1. Kyle from southpark is a Jew

2. You jewish bastard, lend me a cig!!
by matt November 13, 2003
 
2.
Jew
A group of people comprising 0.002% of the world's population yet drawing unproportional amount of media coverage (especially Israeli Jews).
The world is obsessed with Jews. Therefore, the world should get a life.
by sdhgdhdtjhdfjnmfdyjfry November 22, 2006
 
3.
The only people in the world that are simultaneously hated by both the extreme Left and the extreme Right.

Synonym: scapegoat
"The Jews killed Jesus!"

"The Jews control Hollywood!"

"The Jews caused 9/11!"

"The Jews oppress the Palestinians!"

"The Jews ran over my poodle!"
by Harvey Mama March 03, 2005
 
4.
Jew
A person of the jewish faith.
by Rabbi Dude November 04, 2003
 
5.
jew
A southern bastardization and contraction of the two words "did you".
Jack: "Hey Steve, jew fuck Stacy last night?"

Steve: "No, jew?"

Jack: "No."
by Carl Pickens March 20, 2007
 
6.
jew
Let's Clear up some of the Misconceptions in these postings.

A Jew is a person who's mother is Jewish. (Some streams of Judaism argue that Jewish patrimony can be acquired through the father as well).
Jews are not a race but an eclectic mix of different races, nationalities, and cultures; they are a truly multi-cultural and multi-ethnic people. However, within this mix, there are distinct ethnic groups such as the Ashkenazic and Sephardic Jews that make up the overwhelming majority of the Jewish People.
Most American Jews are of Ashkenazic origin -- usually originating from Eastern Europe or the former Soviet Union. Therefore, American Jews could largely be classified as an ethnic group, hence the characteristic stereotypes, although there are exceptions.
A Jew is not a person who practices Judaism, although most Jews do adhere to some form of Jewish practice or cultural tradition.
A Jew is not an Israeli and an Israeli is not a Jew. An Israeli is a citizen of the state of Israel. While most Israeli's are Jewish, there are also non-Jewish citizens of Israel.
A Jew is not automatically a citizen of the state of Israel. A Jew must apply for and be granted citizenship to the state just like everyone else, although most are awarded citizenship rather easily.
Larry King's parents were Ashkenazic Jews. Therefore, regardless of whether Larry King practices Judaism or not, Larry King is an Ashkenazic Jew.
Larry King is not an Israeli citizen.

by NAteshot March 05, 2006
 
7.
jew
1) someone who practises judaism

2) is also a culture/ethnicity, that is to say it has a certain sense of humour, certain type of food and music etc.

3) A person who Mel Gibson talks smack about after he has had too much to drink.
"Jews are responsible for all the wars in the world."
by Clubned August 02, 2006