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13.
an individual who has been terribly sheltered for too long. her parents still run her life, especially her father (who seems rather suspicious and creepy). she has also been spoiled, but not to a point that would ruin her personality.

jessica simpson is often credited by magazines for being one of the most attractive women in the world. unfortunately, a lot of INDIVIDUALS beg to differ. while she was blessed with a very good body, her face is not too attractive and she requires heavy makeup to bring emphasis to her eyes instead of her nose and squared jaw.

her voice is great but not exactly put to good use as far as music goes, having the back beats destroy the way she flows.

her hair is platinum blonde, much as any other pop star's. she seems quite a bit like almost all of the girls that one sees nowadays on networks such as MTV and VH1's top lists.

her intellect is questionable. televised, she seems to have the personality of a rock and a brain the size of an aspirin. whether this is an act or it is realistic is a good question.

if it is an act, she is very disrespectable for putting on such a derogatory show in order to make money, for it does not just disrespect her, but also the female gender.

if, in fact, she really is that dumb... well, i'd blame her parents for focusing more on her celebrity life than her brain, for she seems like she has the potential to be at least moderately smart.

jessica simspon, in my own opinion, is overrated and highly ANNOYING. however, many males (as well as female fans of her music and role as daisy duke in the recent production of "the dukes of hazzard") will beg to differ that she is a "blessing" and a "gift from god." that's actually just their erections talking.

jessica simpson kind of gives girls a bad name, idea, and self-image with her "innocent" personality paired with her risque behaviors/photoshoots/etc. she is slowly becoming lindsey lohan-esque.
average male: jessica simpson is gorgeous.
average female: ... *sadface*
by pandrea July 31, 2006
 
1.
A woman who is probably set for life financially, not because of her music career, but through capitilizing on her disgustingly anencephalic stupidity. She makes Dubya look like Enstein.
Dick: "Think I'll go kill some brain cells".

Harry: "You gonna sniff some glue with me?"

Dick: "Naw, man. I'm gonna go watch "Newlyweds" on EmpTy V.
by Aw Yeah August 02, 2004
 
2.
the dumbest bitch on the face of the earth..proof that looks can get you money
Jessica: i didn't know buffalos had wings?!?!
by imnickmywifeisadumbbitch March 08, 2004
 
3.
Hot as hell but dumb as fuck!
The two extremes.
by Luka June 21, 2004
 
4.
Has everything a man wishes of a woman:
1. Big breasts
2. Big ass
3. No brain
Jessica Simpson? That dumbass blonde?

I don't care, I'd still fuck her.
by Fuckitall June 01, 2006
 
5.
Born and raised in Dallas, Texas,
she made her first mark in the genre of contemporary Christian music. In the late 90's, she landed a record deal with Columbia records. The first album she debut then was Sweet Kisses which unleashed the singles "I Wanna Love You Forever," "I Think I'm In Love," and "Where You Are." Her next album Irresistable in 2001 was also a hit record with the title track spawned and accomplishing the Hot 100 (#15), the Rhythmic Top 40 (#12), Top 40 Mainstream (#3) and Top 40 Tracks (#5). Her next album is titled In This Skin, which is described by Simpson as "uplifting and real".

She is also an often extremely overrated girl in terms of her looks. She has a square jaw, square face, square cheekbones, a strong nose with a bump on the bridge, lips that can only appear pronounce with appropriately applied lipstick, projecting eyebrow ridges, and simple eyes with no flair unless drastically aided by eyeshadow or eyeliner. She would be most suitable as a fairly handsome man if not an average one. Only with good airbrushing, directing of her face to the camera, and other means of softening her look would make her passable as feminine. Her body is curvaceous and overall nice as it is. Her hair appears healthy enough. Yet, the credit to her looks lies in her media-attributed sex appeal, the prancing in her videos, and other aspects of a bubblegum star along with her hair and body. She is indeed a butterface.
She also appears remarkably stupid whether it's due to a bit of acting or not in her NewlyWeds reality show starring her and her husband Nick Lachey of 98 Degrees.
1.) Jessica Simpson is so beautiful. She has gorgeous blonde hair and a great body.*No actual reference to her face.
2.) *in reference to face* Fairly attractive, don't ya think? Beautiful, even so. *generic and delusioned regard of facial beauty whether it be under that mane of shiny blonde hair, alone, with drastic make-up and/or airbrushing, etc.
3.) She looks mannish with that "manjaw" and square face. *correct*
4.) She looks as plain as a Jane, her facial features are so simple and bland regardless of the make-up. *correct*
5.) Good pipes, good stage presence, energy, lots of vibe. *decent compliment*
by Anthony T. March 08, 2005
 
6.
The poster child for abortion. If the conservatives could just see the slight possibility that aborting a fetus prevents another blonde bimbo from starting a singing career, they would quit bombing clinics.
That fucking Pizza Hut commercial with the winged buffalo.
by varietylevel13 May 02, 2004
 
7.
1. Female "Singer" who has obtain millions by splurting out dumb questions and statements. She's married to another equal semi-famous "Singer", Nick, Who probably married her because he wasn't listen to what she was saying when they were dating. Crazy/Beautiful is the best term for this girl.

2. To be a woman who looks like one of God's perfect gifts to earth, but is in fact an insult to anyone with a brain.

3. To obtain millions for being a dumb-ass.
1. "Dude, why you watching Newlyweds?... Oh my, Jessica got her head stuck in the toilet again! She needs to stop kicking, she scuffing up her gold-plated floors."

2."We were watching a show about Dinosaurs and she asked if it was actual footage... She's such a Jessica Simpson."

3. "He slipped on dry ground in the store, but they still settled with him for 1.2 million. Freakin' Jessica Simpson!"
by Trevor Anderson January 19, 2005