| 36. | as requested | ||
|
Phrase that IT support staff put into their Helpdesk tickets as the solution of the computer problem they fixed. Helpdesk work order #99991
Problem description: Computer blue screens frequently. Please fix. Resolution: Works fine, no problem found. As requested. Work order closed. |
|||
| 37. | TFYHITM | ||
|
"Thanks For Your Help In This Matter" The abbreviation for a term commonly used at an Information Technology helpdesk. It is used in electronic communication when you would like to thank someone for doing something without typing out the entire statement. TFYHITM! A:"The Tree is leaning. Please transplant tree into new planter and fill with soil."
B:"Strongly lifted old plant container off wheely thing. Held older container for Lee while she softly lifted the plant into new container. Held plant while Lee tied the bands around the new support stick." A:"TFYHITM!" |
|||
| 38. | Higginbotham's Constant | ||
|
Higginbotham's Constant (denoted as lower-case 'h') is a mathematical constant which represents the total sum of all practical intelligence on any given planet. The implication is that the higher the population of sentient beings on the planet, the lower the average intelligence will be among any large sample set. This does not preclude beings of higher intellect, but it requires that on average, there is one person as far below average as the former being is above average. Person 1: "Why does it seem like the people staffing the company helpdesk get dumber every day?"
Person 2: "Higginbotham's Constant in action, my friend..." Person 1: "I was on jury duty the other day. Have you seen what the trash of society wears into a courtroom? How has society lost so much respect for anyone and anything else in just a few decades?" Person 2: "Higginbotham strikes again..." |
|||
| 39. | HTH | ||
|
Hope This Helps or Hope That Helped. Used frequently on tech-support type forums, and also jokingly as a dismissive term after offering no help whatsoever. Often followed by HAND. Q. "I can't fined the Word file I'm looking for in Word! It was there this morning, but now it's gone! Can someone help?"
A. "Try using search to look for a word in the document itself. If you're on a Mac, that means Spotlight. It will be really quick, but will only work if you haven't overwritten or deleted the file. HTH, HAND!" |
|||
| 40. | HAND | ||
|
Have a Nice Day. Common sign-off at the end of a tech support forum post, often used in conjunction with HTH. Also used (ineffectively) to placate those for whom no help is available. REQUEST FOR ASSISTANCE: "My computer is dead! The mouse won't move and the screen is black!"
FAILURE TO PROVIDE: "Your computer is dead! HTH, HAND!" |
|||
| 41. | Zynga'd | ||
|
1. To break something, or make something worse while trying to improve it. 2. Attempting to get aid from a helpdesk without knowledge of the company it is working for 1.
RICK: Did you hear about Kenny? His car blew up. JOHN: OMG, how did thàt happen? RICK: He wanted to make it go faster by installing a nitrogen tank. JOHN: Looks like he zynga'd badly! 2. HELPDESK: how may I be of assistence? CUSTOMER: Hi, I've been trying to set up a new LAN after installing your latest service pack, but it keeps timing out for no apparent reason. HELPDESK: I see... Could you check if the power is turned on? CUSTOMER: *facepalm* I can't believe I'm getting zynga'd here! |
|||
| 42. | buhguh | ||
|
technical term for the tilde key on the keyboard ~
derived from the famous serial killer buh goo guh johnson who would shank his victims with a knife and then defecate one their chest in a squigly line creating a sort of tilde shaped feces pile. This wa known as the mark of the buh guh. User-Hey this is harry johnson calling cause i am having problems with a key on my keyboard. the key with the squigly line on it. I think it is called a talde or something. well anyway it isnt working, so i called you cause your the helpdesk and i need he hehehe.
Technician- Ok sir please stop laughing like a retard. what you are refering to is known as a tilde to people with an iq of less than 10. And if you had a higher iq than 10 which you dont, then it would be a buhguh. There is only one way to fix your problem and that is to take the computer and shove it up your a$$. User- excuse me i want to know your last name and i want to speak to your manager! Technician- hold on one second sir i will get him....................... Dial Tone- Beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee.. .... Womans Voice- If you would like to make a call please hang up and dial again....message number 23...... |
|||
