A confusing box that controls the lives of closeted satanists
Ket: Am I on the internet

Aise: ...
by Jabu January 01, 2004
at best: a boundless source of information, and a convenient way to keep in touch with people
at worst: a world of porn, blogs, and hackers
The Interent is over-rated
by *tweak* October 03, 2003
A virtual network where people, calling themselves critics, post negative comments about upcoming movies.
"It's a Miramax flick. We gotta bust it up so people stop calling us names on the Internet." - Jay and Silent Bob
by Thumbs May 23, 2003
how the fuck could you not know what the internet is?
i'm a dumbass who don't know what the internet is.
by bobby meldan March 10, 2015
Life's evil yet cherished twin brother that does everything better.
Person with a life: I just love the cool ocean breeze!

Internet addict: I visit it often as Franklin and beat the f*ck out of sharks by activating my Invincibility cheat that I've come to know by heart.

Person with a life: Well I've invested in my own boat and am paying it off fully by my next payday which is 2 weeks from now.

Internet addict: Michael has a total of 23 boats, 4 military ships, and 34 speedphiles.

Person with a life: I have a job.

Internet addict: My Sims each have jobs that pay 30,000$ or more per week. Not including daily income and farming.

Person with a life: I have a girlfriend.

Internet addict: Whenever I'm not watching multiple hot stars banging each other I have my own girlfriend who's also portable.

Person with a life: Mine's hot.

Internet addict: Mine's an Asian otaku.

Person with a life: I actually touch mine.

Internet addict: Touching other humans can transmit from the hundreds of thousands to the billions of germs per touch.

Person with a life: Mine gives me head.

Internet addict: Every day.

Person with a life: GODDAMMIT.
by Co-ral Grimes January 07, 2015
The end of your social life.
PERSON 1: Hey, what'd you do yesterday? I was out all day at a youth club!
PERSON 2: *updating Facebook*
PERSON 1: Hey, is that the Internet?
PERSON 2: *Tweeting*
PERSON 1: Uhhh, hey?
PERSON 2: *being mentally scarred by Tumblr*
by A-Person October 12, 2014
The reason I have no social life and rubbish grades.
Teacher: Ok Class, You will all have to study hard for this test
Me: I wonder who will be online when I get home. i wonder if the internet is running slow... I hope not.
by TheWantedFan146 August 28, 2011
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